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Rape can’t stop If….?

When I saw a post from Shubhangi Salvi, a member of the LinkedIn Advisory Team Board, in my newsfeed I was not surprised, because since morning all the newspapers are publishing the voice of resistance after Hyderabad rape incident with “Doctor Bitiya”. I never understand why we always wait for the next incident to raise our voice.

We should accept that we become indifferent against the incidents which don’t belong to us, this includes me, and my family. We want to raise a voice against each incident, where we can satisfy only to ourselves by caress to ourselves by saying to ourselves that, “I tried to raise the voice, but no one cares. What to do?”. And we surrender ourselves in the hand of the situation.

When I left my recent job and started my venture, I was very much clear in my thoughts that I will never work under a helpless person. And the last statement I told my boss is, ” Today you told me that you are helpless and I am sending my resignation to you because I told you that on the day, you will tell me, you are helpless, I will resign from this company. There was a simple reason behind it and that was I can not work under a helpless person, because soon the day will come when I will become helpless and later I will say the same sentence to subordinate that, “Sorry dear, I can not help you because I am helpless”.

Today I can see the same situation in our country. We have a lot of laws, very strict laws but we do not have the political will to implement it. We feel helpless. Can’t we stop incidents of rapes in our country?

On the other side, we as a public have developed a habit to blame on Government, society, and discrimination behavior done by GOD between a rich and a poor and just want to take rest. We have had a history to fire Rawan’s “Lanka Nagari” by “Hanuman”, just a token to showcase that, what can we do to save the honor of a woman. We should understand that just to march with a candle is not a solution to this problem. We need to wake up.

To think out of the box, please start thinking about what is in the box. Can we ask ourselves one question? Who is the government? Who is society? We are choosing government and government is a group of people chosen by us, they are our representatives. That’s all. The same is about society, Where society comes from? We are a part of it. We as an individual is a part of society or in other words, we are society. Then whom we are waiting for, to take a stand to save a human from a human. We have become inhuman in the skin of a human body.

If in our house, someone breaks the rule of the house, there are two types of behaviors. Suppose a jar full of sugar powder slips from the hand of our maid or cook. We start rebuking them. But if the same happens from our son or daughter, we ignore and try to conceal from our elders. Why? Because we learn discrimination between “Inside” and “Outside” person, between poor and rich, between master and slave. A sense of strangeness is the main idea, which starts discrimination in our minds, this can be removed, but I will talk about it a little later.

I took birth in India, and if you calculate many saints took birth. Today we feel shame on us when the people of the world are looking towards us, and saying that this is a country from where the culture spread all over the world. Our so-called famous “BABA”s are in jail. India has given divine knowledge to the world, but today we become a laughing stock and a sample of mockery because of these irresponsible fake so-called irresponsible saints, who were doing the business of “FAITH”, without any divine knowledge.

We as a human need to focus on some very important things:

  1. Raise a voice, when you see something is going wrong with anyone, it could be male or female
  2. Help the police to nab the culprit, be a witness of the incident.
  3. As a parent teach moral science in our home, not only to a female child, also require for a male child
  4. Don’t live life in fear, after all, we have only one life to live, then why in fear?
  5. Start taking strong decisions. It could seem harmful in a short period, but this would be benefited in the long run
  6. Think about, what we are leaving for our next generation, a fearful society or a strong society.
  7. Don’t depend on the Government or Court to come forward to correct everything. We need to come forward to correct ourselves, to correct our society.
  8. Be spiritual, rather become religious. People are playing with our religious sentiments. If they believe in one GOD, they can never do this. Religion unites never divide.
  9. We are human first after that we are Indian.
  10. Do not become mere spectators or puppets of any other’s mind. Remember you are not a dead body, you are a living being with a beautiful mind.

If you want to judge a person, just see that the list of his or her friend. This will tell you about the character of a person has. This is a very clear message given in our ancient historical incidents. In Mahabharata epic, you can read between the lines that Kaurva brothers taking guidance from “Shakuni” but interestingly Pandava’s brothers were taking guidance from Sri Krishna. Didn’t anyone could see the final result was obvious, that who was going to have the last laugh.

Come back to the point, “Is there any solution to kill the rapist? Not sure? Right…Instead you will feel more secure if you will be able to kill his idea. There is a voice all over the world to give the capital sentence to the rapist. Well, somewhat it could seem a solution, but this is not. We need to do something to kill this IDEA. Fear can not be the solution to everything.

We have a knife to be used or to be misused. We have a revolver, to be used for your security or to kill anyone. The idea is working behind it. In the case of rape, that is the idea, who is forcing at that moment to do the wrongdoing.

Well, how can one clean the idea? It is not a one day job. It starts with the birth of a person. His/her upbringing plays a major role to develop his/her character.

Seriously, if we think, what we are giving today to future generations? We are forcing our thoughts on them. Today a child is too far from our own culture. Our parents, Our Teachers, in our society all NGOs are struggling to maintain the decorum in one’s mindset. We are being pushed by our parents always to reach the first line. And to reach the first line, we become hard enough to pull the person, who is crossing my line. so this way, actual violence or ill thoughts start from home itself.

The only solution to kill the idea is that move the idea to positivity and spirituality. And this is possible only if parents, teachers, preachers set up their examples to kill all the ill will and do the right things at the right time in the right context.

My thoughts are, we need to go back to basics, where our culture starts growing step by step, and there only we can learn the first lesson of spirituality from our own home.

True Spirituality is the only solution for ill wills. Why I am using the word “True” before spirituality because now everything is adulterated. Even religion, faith, and spirituality. We need to find the True Master, who can show the path of truth to our generation as well as the next generation.

What we will sow today, so we will reap in the future.

Thanks for reading.

Bye-bye, take care and send me your review, as usual, I will answer as soon as possible.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

Suggested Readings:

  1. OILING or SPOILING a Relationship
  2. Is a solution itself a Problem
  3. Nothing is everything

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“Nowhere” is “Now-here”. Is It?

There are two famous quotes given to this world by a famous person Andrea Bocelli.  “Nowhere. is…. Now Here” and  “All that counts in life is intention“. The person, who went through pain in life, only that person can understand the happiness of life. He born September 22, 1958, an Italian operatic pop tenor and a classical crossover singer who has also performed in operas. He recorded seven complete operas (La boheme, Tosca, Il trovatore, Werther, Pagliacci, Cavalleria rusticana and Carmen) and some various classical and pop albums.

He born with congenital glaucoma, total blindness came to Bocelli at the age of twelve, after a football accident. He saw the darkness of the life and then for him “Life was “nowhere”. When he understood the aim of his life and become successful with God gifted skills then this quote comes from somewhere inside “Life is now here”.

This quote was misused by a lot of people in this world, just for their vested interest. Somewhere I find an advertisement quoting that the career life was nowhere but it is now here. Smartest people use these words successfully misleading a large crowd by saying that  “GOD was nowhere for you but GOD is now here for us.”  Don’t you feel surprised to hear this?

Nov 20, 2019, 05.22 AM IST, now the date is memorable and recorded in history, when Supreme Court of India clearly mentioned in the Ajodhya verdict that “God is not a juristic person, but idol is

Some important part of “The verdict” is written as below

NEW DELHI: God or ‘Supreme Being’ may be omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent but has no juristic personality, but an idol, worshipped by believers as a physical incarnation of God, is a juristic personality, the Supreme Court has said.

“Legal personality is not conferred on the Supreme Being. The Supreme Being has no physical presence for it is understood to be omnipresent —the very ground of being itself. The court does not confer legal personality on divinity,” ruled a bench of then CJI Ranjan Gogoi and Justices S A Bobde (now CJI), D Y Chandrachud, Ashok Bhushan and S Abdul Nazeer in its landmark judgment settling the 70-year-old Ayodhya land dispute.

Divinity in Hindu philosophy is seamless, universal and infinite. Divinity pervades every aspect of the universe. The attributes of divinity defy description and furnish the fundamental basis for not defining it with reference to boundaries — physical or legal. For this reason that it is omnipresent, it would be impossible to distinguish where one legal entity ends and the next begins,” the bench said.

The SC said in contrast, an idol was identifiable by its physical form and hence could have juristic personality. “The idea of a legal person is premised on the need to ‘identify the subjects’ of the legal system. An omnipresent (God or Supreme Being) being is incapable of being identified or delineated in any manner meaningful to the law and no identifiable legal subject couldemerge,” it added.

The bench further explained the legal difficulty in conferring legal personality on God as “the narrow confines of the law is ill suited to engage in such an exercise (delineating boundaries of a God who is omnipresent) and it is for this reason that the law has steered clear from adopting the approach”.

“In Hinduism, physical manifestation of the Supreme Being exists in the form of idols to allow worshippers to experience a shapeless being. The idol is the representation of the Supreme Being. The idol, by possessing physical form, is identifiable,” it said.

The bunch of above statements stated in verdict by Supreme Court of India clearly mentioned that GOD or Supreme Being does exist. And the definition is clearly referenced as omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent.

So there are two major takeaways:

  1. GOD does exist and GOD is Omnipresent (Present everywhere at the same time), Omniscient (Knowing everything) and Omnipotent (Unlimited Power). At last the supreme power of India’s legal framework could not deny from its existence. 
  2. GOD is top most authority, which is incapable of being identified in framework of Indian Law. So whatever judgement is given by judges are with in framework setup by GOD and Judges are not GOD, but they also comes under GOD same as other human beings. Judges only obey them and doing their duties honestly. 

The saints from all over the world knew this truth, the divine knowledge in early stages of their life and whenever they trying to distribute this truth to common people, they have been killed or ruined or disowned by some religious contractors. Now public know WHY? I do not need to describe more.

I am sure that you are fed up now by listening the same statements in particular i.e. Who made this nature? Who made us? Who is providing a breath to us every second? Why we cannot able to see him? If there is such person exists, please produced in front of everybody?

Well, we will discuss this for a while, before that, I want you to do some exclusive excercise, irrespective of you are theist or atheist, irrespective of you are follower of any religion, irrespective of your gender, irrespective of you belong to any sect of the world’s society, any cast, any color or any creed or so on. So on…

Bring one small size stone and install it near your door. Now do this exercise daily to wash it and throw some fragrance or scent on it. Now start begging. Yes begging like anything. Ask this stone to fulfil your wishes. It will not. You know very well. But you need to continue this exercise daily in morning, before going out for you regular office work or business. Now after some days you can see that if you are asking for 5 wishes, you will get at least one completed. Then suddenly you realize counting is going up. How come? But really you don’t care about that till any one of your wishes are completing on regular basis. You start believing in that stone. It seems it is GOD for you. It has power, a supreme power. Now you start respecting that stone and stone get some valuable place in your home. The actual fact is stone is same stone, there is no change in it, but your criteria of thinking changes, you view point against this stone is completely change. You stated believing in the stone. But eventually you should believe on yourself.

Now this exercise is revealing that whatif another person doing the same exercise is a Muslim brother, Christian brother, Sikh brother or Jain bother etc…etc… Does stone prayer is restricted only to Hindu brother? Obviously not. So if this stone is fulfilling your wishes so the same for other also. It means GOD statue or stone stature or only stone does not need any specific form of prayer to fulfil their wishes. Then why we do prayers in front of any statue? Any answer? I am not restricting here any one to do so, after all this is your life, you can free to do, but my curiosity crossed peak level to find the answer “WHY”?.

The prayer could be in any form and it can be done by any person in this whole world, it goes to GOD, no medium required, no postman required, no WIFI, no Cable and no Internet required.

So the discussion has a direct conclusion. Do not find GOD, find what is not a GOD? Don’t run behind those nouns (a person, a place or things), these nouns, GOD has provided us, to live peacefully.  GOD has direct connection with you, and you have direct connection with those things which is created by GOD, but those are not GOD.

Another way to reach to GOD is, to find the person, who knows who is GOD or where the GOD is? He or She could be only a True Master. And he or she would have one great ability to introduce you face to face with GOD.  

Well now the million dollar question. How can you trust who is a True Master?

The symbol of True Master is very simple. He or She does not connect you with the “Creation” (again Noun), but connect you with the “Creator”, only that person could be a True Master.

And the second most important symbol is that True Master will take only seconds to show you who is GOD.

If any person who is telling you stories or trying to gain some time from you to make you busy in useless activities, it is very clear that he or she cannot be True Master and hundred percent he or she do not have any divine knowledge. 

So now do not explore Who is GOD. Start exploring, what can not be GOD? Well even then if you can’t find satisfactory answer then, try to find the True Master, who can show you GOD within seconds. Then only you can say GOD was nowhere, but GOD is now-here.

Thanks for reading, do send your reviews.

Bye, Take care.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

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Diabetic Relationships 7 Sweet Spots

‘Family and diabetes’, is the theme setup for 2019 for World Diabetes Day. Thank GOD, at least intellegent people in the world is now understanding that we as a human could be the reson behind major diseases faces by human itself.

My personal thinking is that the main reason to highlight this theme is just to make every one understand that how important it is for a patient to get support at home.

Every year, November 14 is observed as World Diabetes Day by WHO and International Diabetes Federation (IDF) to mark the birth anniversary of Frederick Banting, who discovered insulin.

WHO (Wold health Organization) described diabetes as epidemic disease in the world. This is a health problem.

Economic liberalisation in India was initiated in 1991 by Prime Minister P. V. Narasimha Rao and his then-Finance Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh, liberalised the Indian economy, allowing it to speed up development dramatically.

But you know that in 1980s intellectuals understood the problem of diabetes are rising rapidly but after 1991, it increased multifold. A lot of junk food introduced in the market and initially there main target was children, but slowly it also captured adults and then it to eat foods rich in sugar, salt and fat, becomes show-off in all regular parties.

Multinational companies purchased potato from our farmers, which was approx 0.25 paise per kg and started selling fried potato chips our public approx Rs 60.00 per kg. And suddely potato shoots up to Rs 10.00 per kg. And farmer’s own children started purchasing packed potato chips from multinationals. This is only one example, where we lost our ground and become slaves with additional diseases, for which they started providing us thier own multinational manufactured medicines on higher rates. They provide us disease so they know the best medicines and we felt ourseleves helpless. All this leads to an epidemic of non-communicable diseases such as hypertension, heart disease and cancer. Well, off course the diabetes stands right on top of them.

When big money started pouring in our houses, our physical activities went down. Members of our families started relaxing and the reslut comes in suprising way. We achieved 100% of increase in diabetec patients. India is one of the 6 countries of the IDF SEA region where 425 million people have diabetes in the world and 82 million people in the SEA Region; by 2045 this will rise to 151 million. There were over 72.946.400 cases of diabetes in India in 2017.

Now come to the main point, from where this blog started. What happened, if a person of a family get diagnosed with Diabetes. Family shattered. They lost hope immediately, they started counting the days of that memeber. In fact, patiened need support, but he or she gets different environment, in his or her own house. When the dietary habits of the patient have to be modified, it is a better option for the rest of the family too have to make changes for themselves also. If patient develops diabetes-related complications like affecting the eye, feet, heart or kidney, the morale of not just the patient but the whole family is affected, which is completly surprising. They even become laughing stocks, when this happens in learned, educated socities.

Gone are those days, when the diabetes was incurable.

I still remember when in a family gathering, where, would be bride, came to know that his would be husband’s father, was having diabetes, she decided not to marry with him and blame game started that it was not told earlier. Why we scared, this does not show any sign of  untouchability or epedemic, but even then our orthodox  ideas make it complicated. Well in some cases it could be heredity, but not all cases. It can be cured with some hard commitments.

When ever i used to visit old age home, i got so many cases, where children leaves their parent just after diagnosing diabetes. Their simple excuse is that they can not take care of them, becase this disease requires more attention and we are working people so we can only shell-out some money to the organization, so they can take care of them.

In one of the old age home, i remember there are a large number of patients living beyond 90+ years of age. If i am not wrong, many have been living with diabetes for 50+ to 60+ years and they aare still doing well without complications.

Today children forget that one day thier children will thorw away in the same way to them here only.

Relations can work like sure shot medicine. This only need a little care, thats all.

1.Regular Medical Checkup Required: 

The meaining of regular means, at least 4 times in a year, not more than that. There are some mandatory test like the eyes, kidneys, heart and feet at least once a year. Early complication dedction may even be reversed. It should not be left uncontrolled. Diabetes can cause havoc in the body, it is even worse than some of the cancers.

2.Develop Healthy Food Habbits: 

Strict vegetarian diet. Green Vegetables, nuts, pulses fruits etc. Especially strct follow up of doctors prescribed diet.

3.Daily Walk or Excercise Regularly:

Member’s of the family can encourage a person to walk or  exercise regularly at least 5 days in a week. Well, this is a suggestion that the family, as a unit, can decide to go for a walk. This will boostup the moral of patienet and you can also have a strict eye to ensure the patient gets the required exercise. And event this is good for health of all members also.

4.Spending Time Together:

Members of the family should think of the way to spend time together. Especially couple. This helps to maintain a healty and positive atitude.  Some of the ways like group Yoga, Group meditation, indoor and outdoor games, are all excellent examples of how a person with diabetes can get support from his family.

5.Strict on Medicine Schedule:

Sometime, it could possible that, patients forget to take their medicines. The reason could be any, but any of the memeber like the spouse or children can remind the patient to do so. 

6.Avoid Stress: 

Remember you are not, who is operating this world. If any other person think in this way, let them do. You try to undersand your limitations. In this world, every one is stressed, and they are looking any easy way to bring it out. And you could be a their victim. So give time to recongnize your self. Be restricted positive. Do mediation regularly.

7.Restriction on Alcohol and Smoke

Memebers of the family should keep a watch to conrol this habbit. This should be big no, as soon as diabetese diagnosed.

Well the theme could be any for this day but i personally believe, this is actually depend more on the personal relationship, than to accept as a mere compulsion between couple.

If a person takes care of his parents, obviously his or her generation learn from them and they will take care of you and also by teaching this,  you are saving your future generation. Because what they will see today , will do tomorrow.

Suggested Readings:

  1. Nothing is Everything
  2. I Love You

Thanks for your reading, do send your reveiws as usual, we will reply as soon as possible. By. Take care.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

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OILING or SPOILING a Relationship

“Trust in Relationship”, If you have seen the logo of our group, you will easily find that this is a tagline of Aaradhya Groups(AGs). An organization that cares for relations. The group is established with a motto to realize everyone the loss of an important feeling nowadays from our life and that is “TRUST”. We are competing with each other in the race of faith but actually we are losing TRUST every second among mankind. 

What is the relation? – Can you guess, we can not live without relation. Try to see near you. You feel the definition of relation was misunderstood by everyone. I and you also include this everyone. 

We feel only living being is connected with relations, but this is not true. Living or Non-Living all are related to us. In living creatures, this is a two-way relationship, but in non-living things, it is one way, but it exists.

Ok, let’s take an example:

First, we take living beings. Well, we have relations with our family, friends, colleagues, strangers. Well, it is always two ways, even, if you do not know the stranger, even then, you have a relationship of non-familiar relationships. 

Now count on non-living things. Do you see, the table has a relation with the chair, but we have a relation with both. We can use a table or chair either altogether or separate each. So non-living things have a relationship between them, but there is one more relationship that exists and that is Non-living with living beings. Right?

Well now come to the most important point “TRUST”. Take an example of a non-living thing first. Suppose you are full of anger and you want to break the head of the person standing in front of you. You don’t have any weapons with you. You are in office, scolding him, calling names, and suddenly you look towards a paperweight, it is lying down in front of you. You picked it up and full of rage, you throw it. Can you guess what happened just now? You have shown full TRUST on that paperweight, by making yourself understand that it will work for me. For the time being, it will become my weapon. 

The pace of life is changing from moment to moment. sometimes we want to catch life, some times life tries to catches us.

A person told me when you are a child, you want to live your own life, but somebody told you, first of all, you need to gain the experience. And You agreed on that so you started following our GODFATHERS.

Sometimes, godfathers are not our idol what we were looking for, again lack of experience becomes obstacles. We changed our godfather again and again and suddenly on the edge of life, we realized we lost something very important and that is TIME.  But actually we gained a precious thing in this duration and that is called “EXPERIENCE”. And that is what we were looking for.

Well, now this is the time when we need to give proper values to our experience because we have not got it through ancestors, we have earned it. And when we are not able to realize the value of experience, then we are also following rat race. 

We know the PRICE of everything but the VALUE of nothing

Suppose, today if we become king alike person, and having all the luxuries, one can think of it. I do not have any person who claps for me, what is the use of this worldly affairs. We realize then only, we have earned nothing. We lost everything if we lost people, we lost our relationship, we lost others’ trust, and the most precious, irrecoverable TIME.

Today, we will try to discuss, all important points how should we strengthen our relationships:

Build trust in relationships:

I am not here to make you remember about any romantic commitment to last, but my intention is to make you remember that TRUST is the base of every relationship. Now the relationship could be a business, Corporate, among friends, relatives, and the most one is a relationship from yourself. The relationship brings two people together. It is not necessary that relationships are only for good relations, even it flows to enemies also. for example: before start hostility, one person should have trust in the second person, that first-person has lost his trust by becoming dishonest. When you are in love with someone, the first step is that your partner earns your trust. Well, if this relationship somehow converts into a long-distance relationship, this is the only feeling, which ties up both with each other. Well, you can say they either mastered themselves the art of TRUST or really they understand each other so much in deep, they do not have distrust on each other. And this happens because, just like love and respect, TRUST has to be earned over and over and should be able to withstand any storm that comes it’s their way.

Here are some points. you should remember to practice:

Value Yourself:

Be honest here and ask yourself, are you feeling often that you are good for nothing? No, it is not a joke and also no need to be too much serious when you are trying to pick up this question. The reason is very simple. Does anybody know who they are? I am sure not. Well if I will say you are a small particle of the source of energy, maybe you will not believe in me. but you will get something more in our previous article “I Love You” And I am sure, after reading it, the first time you will realize and recognize yourself.

When you understand your source, then you will never feel that you are good for nothing. you will start giving value to yourself. You will start loving yourself. You will start respecting you. So the main point is to find your own worth and believe in you.

Have faith in the relationship

Well, here I am not restricting the word partner only to your lover. I am not talking here only for a relationship between a couple Instead of I am talking here for all types of relationships, it could be in every sphere of life with anybody. Well everyone has prior experience with instincts. Well, it is called sometimes the third eye. Something only you can see, only you can realize. But somehow this develops with experience. It is very rare that someone brings this knowledge since birth. 

In general Sixth sense works only for experienced people and this develops trust between a relationship. But what about faith, this is always unconditional. To understand more, I will suggest reading my article “Trust Builts slowly but destroys quickly”

Building trust in a relationship involves creating a strong and genuine love for each other.

Value honesty:

Sometimes actual message lost in communication, so better to cross-check before you believe in that. And another most important thing is to listen honestly and accept the statement honestly. Some time takeaway is misunderstood because we are not listening honestly and this creates mess up. Most of the strongest relationships are built on the foundations of honesty and truth, so make sure you’re doing it right.

Listen Properly:

Do not be judgemental with your prenotions. Maybe your experience is very bad with the person you are dealing with, but it is not always he or she is wrong. We need to listen properly & honestly, then try to collect takeaways. Try to put your foot in client shoes, then only you can get the pain he is suffering from. So this happens only if you listen properly.

Talking on Pain Point is a must

Sometimes petty issues can make huge differences, so this is good to pick up one by one and bury it forever. If we can not talk sense, better not to talk nonsense. It may be possible one partner is suffering, but having patience, which could be a wrong signal to another partner, thinking that you are wrong and feeling guilty for any particular issue. better to talk and make it clear. If need to point out your partner’s mistake do it if need to accept your fault, accept it. 

Resolve issues together

If money lost, it will return, but if the trust is lost, then everything lost. It is very difficult to bring it back. You should be ready to lose everything. And in that case, it is better to settle down either issue or the relationship. There is no meaning to continue in further. Do not let others come between to settle down things in your relationship. Do it yourself, face to face. You should be able to reach at least either end.

Ask questions

“What is in harm to ask?” If you have doubts regarding any of the matters with your partner or you need clarification, you should be proactive and take initiative. Do be the judge without giving the opportunity to another party to clarify. If could not satisfy, ask again, it is your duty to save a relationship and also it is your right to know the truth.

Develop a connection beyond the relationship:

Maturity comes with experience, so initially, this would be a duty for both parties to maintain a relationship, beyond a mare relationship. It should contain trust and belief on each other, never lie, so doubt will not take birth.  enjoy the gettogether frequently, so some offline issues can be clarified.

Life is uncertain, but there are certain things can be maintained by us. 

The best way to do this is, ask below three things in life:

Oh Lord, give me the courage to change the things, what I can change

Oh Lord, give me the courage to accept the thing, which I can not change

Oh lord, give me the wisdom to understand, what I can change or what I can not Change

 

Thanks for reading. Do send your reviews, as usual, I will reply as soon as possible.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

 

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Trust builts slowly but destroys quickly

A famous saint used to live his livelihood by weaving cloths. He has to work many days and nights to prepare one sheet of cloth. Everybody knows that whatever the situation maybe he will not get angry. He was famous to analyze the situation find the problem and then try to find the solution.

One day a mischevious person bet among his friends and took up a challenge. He told all of his friends, “Today I will show you, how fake he is and how he will get angry today?”

When the saint reached to market, that person immediately approached him and started asking price of the full sheet of cloth. The saint told him the price, but that person insisted, “I want to see the whole sheet before purchasing”. One of the pupils accompanying with the saint, open the sheet of the cloth. That person asked for a pair of scissors and started cutting the cloth into two-part, then again he asked,” What is the price now?”.

The saint immediately understood his intentions but replied calmly the half of the price.  That person immediately picked up the pair of scissors and tore the cloth again into two parts. And again asked for the price. The saint smiled and told him again half of the price from the previous price. That person again picked up the pair of scissors and again started doing the same process.

The pupil was surprised to see that the buyer was tearing his sheet of cloth again and again into half, without the intention of purchasing and the saint was smiling and was telling him price every time. When the process completed and now there was no scope left to tear off the cloth one more time in half, that person stood up and told to the saint, “I am sorry, I do not want to purchase your cloth” The saint smiled again and replied “Its Ok. No issues. As you wish”.

When the person left the place, the pupil asked surprisingly, “You know that he was a mischievous person and he was playing with you. But why you have not reacted? He has destroyed your hard-earned money” The saint smiled that there are two things, “First, he came here with one strong trust on me that I will not become angry in any situation”. “And I tried to build his trust stronger”. “And second, you told right that he destroyed my two weeks hardworking and I have nothing left for next two weeks as an earning. He destroyed my today, but actually, today, he destroyed his future by showing his upbringing.”

Trust can not be enjoyed alone. It is a bilateral relationship. There should always be two parties to start with. When you read in your text bok the friction between two stones can bring fire out from stone. Had you believed that? No, not at all, at least at first time. But when your subject teacher told you the same story, you trust him a little bit but not on the full story. But when you have seen first time by himself or herself, then only, you immediately trusted on the textbook, and the words told by your teacher. The reason is you experienced himself the same you read. so the Trust is calculative. Trust needs proof.

The main difference between faith and trust is that the trust is conditional and faith is unconditional.

You can have faith in GOD, but before starting an airplane journey, you try to get maximum information from all sources about the pilot, about his past experience in flying a Boeing Plane. especially the number of successful journies completed and reason for unsuccessful journies. Actually, you want to be more sure, that you have trust in him.

There are two major dimensions, in front of people before they make decisions on trust. Preconscious, where a person already made half decision with his own beliefs, or experiences or stories heard in childhood. So, in that case, fifty percent decision is already taken by his brain. 

Second is a conscious decision, means calculative and conditionals. It is a slow process. If the condition is agreed to calculation, only then trust starts, but as soon as one condition fails, the trust started shaking and started dropping very quickly.

Trust is built with consistency. Like drops coming in a bucket through tap can fillup bucket only after consuming one whole day, and if the bucket has one hole in it then, in that case, it can take up to one month, and sometimes even the feasibility would be it maybe or maybe not.

In today’s world, trust is used as one of the most valuable currencies among humans. Can you assume to build any relationship without this with anyone? Obviously not?.

Among every relationship, trust is working somewhere in between. People do business, just because of the trust factor. We get married, we pay online payments, we purchase some items, you pay to expensive services, etc..etc… just because of the trust factor.

Well, whatever you want to achieve in your life, don’ start with developing networking, start with building trust among your network. The network will automatically develop.

As earlier said, trust can not work with a single party, it needs two to make four. It takes a lot of time to build. The whole process of gaining trust starts with understanding first. If you do not know a person, how can you trust him?

But this is also the part of the process that a single wrong or unmatured action can ruin any relationship you’ve built over a period of time within seconds.

To understand this you need to understand human behavior.

  1. The human needs to be caring even if he does not want to care.
  2. All humans are internally wired for connection but they disconnected deliberately.
  3. All humans want to feel important.
  4. Most humans like the same things.
  5. Most humans want to trust the same things.
  6. Most humans don’t want to initiate, they prefer to wait.

These are some common behaviors, you can find more.

Every new trust-building process will convert existing trust into a strong belief.

Don’t trust me, trust yourself, believe in yourself only.

Thanks for reading, do send your reviews as usual.

Bye-bye, take care

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

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