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Reel Life v.s. Real Life

Ashok Mehra, a well-known film artist, producer, film director, met me last winter season in 2018, in Delhi. I spend approximately one month with him, but then I didn’t know anything about him, before Mr. Chaman, one of my Video Editor friend introduced me officially that what is his profession.

We met, we spend a good time along with each other, we took so many times lunch and dinner together. We share jokes, incidents, our viewpoints on any particular topic. I was busy in studio work, but whenever he visited the studio, the atmosphere of the studio changed every time like an entertainment mood. He came close to the heart with everyone because he was living his real life. When I came to know about his profession then only I realize how can an actor be.

I realized if a person has really a reality in his behavior in day to day life or you can say real in nature, nothing unnatural, nothing fake in behavior, then it is very easy to live a reel life with real-life amicably without any difficulty. He carks jokes with any dialogues, which relates to his any of the movie or play, we felt that it was never to show-off, it was real, direct come out from heart, not from the mind.

One of my blogs, I referenced you about Mr. Joginder Singh Puri, a great Professor from the USA and one of my mentors, once told me that whenever you get an opportunity to meet any person, meet like this is the very first time you are meeting with him. And when you leave the same person, leave him like, this is your last visit and you will never meet with him at least in this life. This is a philosophy of life. We do not have command on our birth as well as our death.

Once I got a clipping of a lecture delivered by Mr. Ratan Tata, and his one statement from his speech was very practical and very touchy. He stated,” You have seen ECG machines near hospital beds. When it is showing curved lines, up and down, it means life is still alive, but when it is showing a straight line, it means life is no more”. Life has similar ups and downs for each person. A person stands up, fell down, again stands up, again fell down. it means life is still there, his will power is forcing the person to stand up and fight with all ills. But when the person quits, the lifeline becomes straight. No ups and downs, no life anymore.

The philosophy to live a life is,

Live your real life like an actor is acting in reel life, and acting in reel life like living a real-life”.

Sometimes it seems, how fake is this definition, but if you go in-depth, you will feel this is the only definition that is near a fact nowadays. If you try to find nearby, you will surprise to realize that you are surrounded by fake relationships and fake relations. It is very rare you can find true love near you. You will surprise to see that in adverse situations, your true relations are among the very first person to left you alone.

Once I attended funeral proceedings, there was a custom to speak some words for the decease. Everybody was using selected great words for him. I was thinking that if he is very good in nature, very polite, very helpful and energetic in his behavior, then why he was living in such a miserable condition. Why he died because of short of medicines. People of this world have two faces. Or you can say there are multiple faces behind one mask.

Once I was reading the book written on Swami Vivekanand. He stated somewhere, “if your life is cool, it means you are on the wrong path”. This does not mean that we do not need a cool life. He wanted to indicate, if everyone is praising you, there could be two reasons behind it. First one, you are really a very good person and the second is that you never come out from your comfort zone. you never took the risk in your life to do something challenging. And then only you will live a cool life. The struggle is a part of our life, do not avoid it, instead of enjoying it.

In short, if I bring out me from myself, then masks will be removed forever automatically. Confused?

Take one live example from day-to-day life. If my manager is asking a report from me immediately, and I am asking for two days to prepare it, what does it means? There are two possibilities, either I am not working preparing a report on a day to day basis, so I want more time to prepare it, it is called laziness. But if I want to play with the numbers and aksing two more days to prepare the strategy, how to crooked the report, how to manipulate it before presenting it before my manager.

In the above situation, either I need to accept I am a lazy person or maybe I am busy with other engagements, so the report is not prepared so far. Or in another situation, I used to wear a mask on my face and tell my manager that the report is ready, but this is not in a presentable mode, so It will take time to prepare it. Or maybe I can crook some more ideas to make him fool. But actually I am making myself a fool, and this is a hidden truth lies between the lines.

In the reel life, the viewer, hero, heroine, characters and even the villain are well defined, hence, it is very simple to understand and in some movies, if the artist is doing similar roles when they already did in any previous films then, it becomes simple to recognize in advance. But in real life, it is like a suspense movie, where hero and villain are unknown but there is no viewer. I may mistake the hero for a villain or villain for a hero etc.. In the real-life, we require more understanding than usual to understand what is good and what is bad, then who is good and who is bad, in which circumstance he/she is good and in which circumstances he/she is bad.

Sometimes, it is seen that young minds are often carried away by what they see in the movies, without judging, what is true and untrue. In the movies, often obsession is justified in the name of love, violence in the name of revenge against injustice. And a fresh mind or young mind taking it as real. Do you know why it happened? Because the actor who is living his role in that movie is so honest with the character, that he/she mistook as real. But this real-life acting actually becomes successful in his/her reel life.

The clown lives a public life as real as he can but just think for a while, doesn’t he has issues any issue in his life. He does, but his real acting makes us feeling like hat we laugh a lot and actually forget our personal issues for a while. This happens only because he justifies his character honestly, he understands his responsibility.

Once a person asked me a beautiful question. Tell me, “Who is a more genuine person? A film Actor or a Cricketer.” The question was very practical. I could not give the correct answer on that day, because I could not give the right logic behind it. But today I can. Even today I can compare a Clown also with a Cricketer. Now you may have a question, if a Clown and a Cricketer both are the same, then why there is a lot of difference between their monetary conditions. I can not compare both in moneywise, but yes, both are playing real characters. A Cricketer plays a natural game and a Clown plays an honest character. And both have one special common feature while playing their roles in their characters. And that is. They don’t get a second chance or they don’t get the option of RETAKE. But when we are thinking of film actors, they can go for ‘n’ numbers of retakes. A Film actor can be different in nature in real life and reel life. Only that film actor can be famous who has no difference between both the lives.

A fake person doesn’t have a long life. Either in his life or afterlife.

In summary, we can say that “Luxuries and lies have huge maintenance costs, but truth and simplicity are self-maintained without any cost”. So better not to work with mix emotions. Emotions should be pure to attract another emotion.

It is possible that working for success will make you a Master for your skills, but working for satisfaction will make you a legend.

Thanks for reading, send your reviews, as usual, I will send you my replies as soon as possible.

Take care, Bye Bye

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

Direct email: neeraj.bhaia@aaradhyagroups.com

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Want to Retire @ 50? Now Impossible is Possible

  • A person asked: “Money, Money, where are you honey; I want to retire with your fire”.
  • Money Smiles, “Catch me, if you can” Gold spreads everywhere, I am there; I am here”.

So, you want to retire at 50? Let us calculate it between 45 and 50 somewhere, so you will get five more extra years to enjoy. But just remember, retirement does not mean, no work, It means enough combination of active and passive income in your kitty to relax and easily covering emergency and all types of unseen unavoidable circumstances while you are enjoying your luxury life.

Some days ago, I met with a middle-aged couple, who could not gather enough money in their whole career life to be able to purchase their own residence. They both lived a well-maintained luxuries life, with a high profile job. They visited so many places in the world, but never think of to purchase their own home. They thought, they would be earned enough money at the time of retirement, so they can purchase their own home, wherever and whatever they want.

Now, what actually happened:

  1. The real estate price continues up. So whenever they want to purchase, start to bargain and every time they felt that property is a little bit costly.
  2. The inflation rate went up every year
  3. Their savings were not enough to beat the pace of inflation.
  4. They want residence matching with their lifestyle, which seems not possible now
  5. Financial institutions denied a home loan to them because of their overaged factor.
  6. Their children were well settled and they prefer a nuclear family, so they left both of them.

There was an incident that happened personally with me when I need money in an emergency. I sold all of my Shares, stocks at half of the price from the price I have purchased 10 years back. I thought I mistook myself as a great financial managed person. For the last 10 years, I was thinking that I was managing money, but actually money was managing me. It was an eye-opener for me. I am failed to manage it, but I learned a great lesson and that was priceless.

So here we will discuss only two points “How to make money” and then “How to manage money”?

Let us start:

What are Your Only Options?

After completion of our schooling, we have three options for earnings:

  1. Become an Employee
  2. Become a skilled Professional
  3. Become a businessman, an employer and provide jobs to others

But what actually we are missing in your school days, we will discuss further in the same blog.

Our Normal Reactions to Purchase

Let us analyze a situation:

I am offering you to buy something very costly. You have below options to give answers.

  1. I can’t afford it, I can’t buy it, I am not so rich, I can’t think even dream of it. (Helpless)
  2. How I can afford it? (Denial mode with a little surprise)
  3. How can I afford it? (Thoughtful process to find the way, to get it, to own it)

In the first two statements, you blocked your road of growth. The only third one is practical because it forces you to think over it, to find ways to fulfill your dreams.

Common Attitude about Money

You can find a lot of persons saying, “What is in the money”, “Money is not everything”, “GOD gave us a lot of wealth, so why to worry for the money?” Another one, “I literally not interested in money”. “Money is secondary in my life”. “Money does not matter for me”.

One more example, “Job! I have enough parental money, I am doing the job just to spend my time”. A very enthusiastic person is stating, “I am working, because I love my job.”

This is the fact of the life that “You can not avoid money”, but similar you should not be attached to money as a real thing. Money is power, if it is in the wrong hand, it could be enough to mess-up. But if it is in the royal hands, every single buck will become gold.

These all rubbish statements. Without money, no one can survive. Only blessings from elders and from GOD cannot fulfill your appetites. Just remember Money is a Power and you have to work hard to earn it. Here we will talk about Work Smart instead of Work Hard.

Every person has a weak and needy part of the soul and that can be bought, and every individual also had a part of his soul, which is strong enough that it could never be bought. It is the only question of which one is stronger?

Are you writing your own Fate or depends on your Karmic Fate?

Do one exercise with me. From today onwards ask yourself one question daily, “Where is this daily activity taking me”? “Am I doing all the right things in my life, and if yes, then the million-dollar question, “Why all odd happened to me only”.

Analyze today. “If life is pushing you or you are pushing life”. Generally, life does not tell you anything it always pushes you, throw you, and break you, just to stand up.

If you think your senior, your superior, your boss is a problem, then try to show them your best part of working, and even if there is a problem, then you don’t have an option, just to change them.

Else, if they are right and your problem is only yours, then you are in a problem. You have to change yourself. Then you need to understand the problem is within you, and the solution is also within you.

Change is Inevitable: Either for you or for Situation

This is a universal truth that it is not easy to change others, but this is also true that to change yourself is also not an easy task as we think of.

You cannot teach a new trick to the old dog unless he wants to learn. But this is not for others, just apply this idiom up to yourself. It is not easy to change habits either if it is laziness, or indiscipline or the love to get a salary check at the end of the month after doing minimum work.

This is also a bitter truth that most people become the slave for money and then curse their superiors or bosses always. You need to realize this truth now or never.

The world is filled with talented people, but why they are poor because they don’t want to use their talent or maybe this is also true that they don’t know they have talent.

If really you want to learn a lot in a single life, within a single organization then move yourself department to department to learn more new things, not only for the job or to get a hike, but to be self-sufficient one day.

Because a job cannot be a long term solution for all of your needs, it is only a short term solution for time being.

When you are short of money, you always started thinking and talking about money while eating, wandering, sleeping, playing, etc. Many are working just to get over the fear that if they will not work, they will lose the salary or wages, then what about expenses, who will pay for them?

What is Money?

The money is not real, the more you think real, you will work harder for it. Don’t work for money, let money work for you. Some people work for money but for some people, money works for them.

Run for money is nothing but fear pushes you out of the door and desire calls to you to come in the door.

Our Mind is a powerful asset, and this is real money for us. We need to train it, so it can earn for generations. If you have a problem with money, and you are running behind money to collect more, than, more money will not solve your problem.

The more you will get money, the more you will find yourself in debt. Sometimes money can solve some problems for the time being, but intelligence solves all types of problems at the root level.

Emotions for Money:

Use your mind and emotions in your favor, not against you.

Most people have a price just because of emotion. And emotion is nothing but fear & hunger. Fear of insecurity of money. It could be a loss of a job or no money at the end of the month to pay bills. So just to overcome this fear, they work hard. And then hunger to get all things, bring pleasures in life. Well, hunger can be changed with another noun i.e. desire. People do more work to full fill their desires. Isn’t it?

To spend your life living in fear and never exploring the dream is like punishing yourself. On another side to working hard for money and thinking that it will buy all the things, which will make you happy, is also punishing yourself for nothing.

Learn to use your emotions to think, not think with your emotions.

The best example of fear and hunger is the Stock Market. If you are trading in share market and putting your hard-earned money in different deals and started praying then you are making fool to yourself. It is not business, it is a gambling.

Buying stocks with a long term vision with financial literacy is good, but when you sell it out just for a fear of market declining, it will not work. And if you are in profit and you are looking for more and more, that is greed. And both are harmful.

The difference between Informed and Uninformed

Investing is not buying, it is more knowing, what to buy, when to buy and how to buy. People think we will earn money while we will sell, but actually investing is to know, you should be in profit, before investing in it. So in a layman language cut your cost before you buy.

                                        Human life is a struggle between ignorance and illumination.

Who are your public relations officer? You yourself. You should search for Information & earn self-knowledge, only then you can understand what you do not know and what you know.

Recognize Yourself:

Workers work hard so they do not get fired from the job, and employers pay just enough so a worker does no quit. Ask any colleague “I am going to quit”, do you want to come with me”. Only the honest person will speak out, “yes I want to but what about my job, who pays my salary, next month my promotion is due. So I want to, but I am not”.

How to Manage your Money

Learn to Manage Yourself:

Need to learn 3 Management aspects to win yourself:

  1. Management of Cash Flow
  2. Management of System
  3. Management of People

When I was in the job, I faced the same issue. As soon as the month completed, salary credited to my bank account, the first day of the new month, all money shows outflow. I can see only all debits in my bank account? Where had the money gone? Finish. Cash In-and a Cash-Out took only 24 hours. So money was with me only for 24 hours. I never understand the point number two. What is the system? Actually, it is nothing but to understand the logic of demand and supply, not for any specific thing or item, for all types of things in the world, even this is applied to humans also. The third point is interesting that who is people to be managed? None, but you, yourself. Learn to sell yourself, learn to market yourself. You as your skills are actually salable commodities.

If you think you are lacking some specific skills, just learn to work with a person more than knowledgeable than you. It is called the synergy of a professional specialist. If you will learn nothing, do not worry, you will have a bright skill to learn indirectly and that is, your communication skills will improve, and you will become a Subject Matter Expert. Doesn’t it priceless?

You could be a good learner only if you could become a good seller, you could become a good marketer, and after all, if you could become a good teacher.

Be Honest Today & Ask Yourself:

  1. If you have purchased your house, or planning to purchase your house. What do you think about it? Will your house is a liability to you or it would be a good investment for you.
  2. At what date you are paying you monthly expense bills? Is it the first day of the month or the last day of the due date?

Don’t Chase Money, Let Money chase you

In the previous section, you answer for point number 1 is, “An Investment”, then you are pretty good, but if the answer is “Liability”, you have already missed an opportunity to become rich.

In the previous section your answer for point number 2 is, the first day of the month, it means as soon as your salary credited, you start paying you expenses, and won’t allow your money to grow. If you are paying it before one day of the due date, you could have at least earned bank interest for some days. If you are a businessman, do not pay your taxes first, pay your taxes before the last day.

Don’t become what school making you, try to be what you want to be, what you should be.

Intelligence solves the problem and produces money. To understand this let us dig a little bit more about active and passive income.

Active income is nothing, but income coming from your day to day work, it could be salary, commission, business income, etc., which needs your presence.

But passive income is income generated by you, and it does not require your presence, for example, bank interest, etc.

What are the business categories where you can earn passive income?

  1. Rental Income
  2. Income from Fixed Deposits, Bonds, Promissory Notes
  3. Income from Royalties like music, book writings, bloggers income, story writing, scriptwriting, etc.
  4. Income from Stocks
  5. Income from investments to a small business as a partnership or equity sharing etc…etc…etc.

Recognize Your Powers:

Every person should learn and understand three powers:

  1. How to save yourself in all type of emergencies
  2. How to earn money when you don’t have any support from others
  3. To learn Who I am, what you know, what you don’t

No doubt, you are a born Intelligent person, but it is possible that other side of this world, somewhere one more person already born, is more intelligent than you. Find him and give him employment and learn from him.

Join schools not to design yourself as a good employee, let school proud of you by producing an employer, who can give the job to many employees.

No one is stopping you from making money, but this is always an emotional decision. Don’t trap yourself in it. You should not work for money, let money should work for you. 

Losses come in life to give you a learning experience:

Do not count your losses with a single word. For example: When you buy a house and it becomes your liability then it means: It is Loss of time, Loss of additional capital, Loss of Knowledge, Loss of Information, Loss of opportunity cost.

The first house should come up with a planned way so it can become your asset and it generates income. This house will bring the second house as your residential house.

Networking is for Giving not to take:

From my parents, I always learn one thing, “You should part a little percentage of profit for charity” So earn then you give. But life shows me help those who cannot help you in return, this ends up your expectations and only then it counts in Charity, else this is a business. So it is reverse now, “Give without any expectation and then you will earn.”, and this is not only for money, that is true in all sense of worldly affairs. Try it from today.

Pick up BAD HABITS within you and KILL them forever

  1. Fear: Losing money is a phobia. Learn to cross the line. Don’t bury your failures. Convert disaster into an opportunity.
  2. Cynicism: Uncheck Doubts and fear creates Cynic. Cynic person criticizes and winner analysis. Find a good superior Boss/Manager/Professional/Agent etc. Who are masters in his skill? Learn how to stop and then when to stop, your fear will remove. Don’t focus on I do not want, instead focus on what you want
  3. Laziness:  Become greedy, you will never feel laziness. Ask yourself “what is in it for me?” and then your mind starts to exercise to find something. Be hungry, your mind is enough smart to get you in.
  4. Educate yourself: Do not use your arrogance to hide your ignorance that you are not educated enough to understand financial jargon. Start educating yourself today.

Thanks for reading. Send your reviews, as usual, I will reply as soon as possible.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

 

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Rape can’t stop If….?

When I saw a post from Shubhangi Salvi, a member of the LinkedIn Advisory Team Board, in my newsfeed I was not surprised, because since morning all the newspapers are publishing the voice of resistance after Hyderabad rape incident with “Doctor Bitiya”. I never understand why we always wait for the next incident to raise our voice.

We should accept that we become indifferent against the incidents which don’t belong to us, this includes me, and my family. We want to raise a voice against each incident, where we can satisfy only to ourselves by caress to ourselves by saying to ourselves that, “I tried to raise the voice, but no one cares. What to do?”. And we surrender ourselves in the hand of the situation.

When I left my recent job and started my venture, I was very much clear in my thoughts that I will never work under a helpless person. And the last statement I told my boss is, ” Today you told me that you are helpless and I am sending my resignation to you because I told you that on the day, you will tell me, you are helpless, I will resign from this company. There was a simple reason behind it and that was I can not work under a helpless person, because soon the day will come when I will become helpless and later I will say the same sentence to subordinate that, “Sorry dear, I can not help you because I am helpless”.

Today I can see the same situation in our country. We have a lot of laws, very strict laws but we do not have the political will to implement it. We feel helpless. Can’t we stop incidents of rapes in our country?

On the other side, we as a public have developed a habit to blame on Government, society, and discrimination behavior done by GOD between a rich and a poor and just want to take rest. We have had a history to fire Rawan’s “Lanka Nagari” by “Hanuman”, just a token to showcase that, what can we do to save the honor of a woman. We should understand that just to march with a candle is not a solution to this problem. We need to wake up.

To think out of the box, please start thinking about what is in the box. Can we ask ourselves one question? Who is the government? Who is society? We are choosing government and government is a group of people chosen by us, they are our representatives. That’s all. The same is about society, Where society comes from? We are a part of it. We as an individual is a part of society or in other words, we are society. Then whom we are waiting for, to take a stand to save a human from a human. We have become inhuman in the skin of a human body.

If in our house, someone breaks the rule of the house, there are two types of behaviors. Suppose a jar full of sugar powder slips from the hand of our maid or cook. We start rebuking them. But if the same happens from our son or daughter, we ignore and try to conceal from our elders. Why? Because we learn discrimination between “Inside” and “Outside” person, between poor and rich, between master and slave. A sense of strangeness is the main idea, which starts discrimination in our minds, this can be removed, but I will talk about it a little later.

I took birth in India, and if you calculate many saints took birth. Today we feel shame on us when the people of the world are looking towards us, and saying that this is a country from where the culture spread all over the world. Our so-called famous “BABA”s are in jail. India has given divine knowledge to the world, but today we become a laughing stock and a sample of mockery because of these irresponsible fake so-called irresponsible saints, who were doing the business of “FAITH”, without any divine knowledge.

We as a human need to focus on some very important things:

  1. Raise a voice, when you see something is going wrong with anyone, it could be male or female
  2. Help the police to nab the culprit, be a witness of the incident.
  3. As a parent teach moral science in our home, not only to a female child, also require for a male child
  4. Don’t live life in fear, after all, we have only one life to live, then why in fear?
  5. Start taking strong decisions. It could seem harmful in a short period, but this would be benefited in the long run
  6. Think about, what we are leaving for our next generation, a fearful society or a strong society.
  7. Don’t depend on the Government or Court to come forward to correct everything. We need to come forward to correct ourselves, to correct our society.
  8. Be spiritual, rather become religious. People are playing with our religious sentiments. If they believe in one GOD, they can never do this. Religion unites never divide.
  9. We are human first after that we are Indian.
  10. Do not become mere spectators or puppets of any other’s mind. Remember you are not a dead body, you are a living being with a beautiful mind.

If you want to judge a person, just see that the list of his or her friend. This will tell you about the character of a person has. This is a very clear message given in our ancient historical incidents. In Mahabharata epic, you can read between the lines that Kaurva brothers taking guidance from “Shakuni” but interestingly Pandava’s brothers were taking guidance from Sri Krishna. Didn’t anyone could see the final result was obvious, that who was going to have the last laugh.

Come back to the point, “Is there any solution to kill the rapist? Not sure? Right…Instead you will feel more secure if you will be able to kill his idea. There is a voice all over the world to give the capital sentence to the rapist. Well, somewhat it could seem a solution, but this is not. We need to do something to kill this IDEA. Fear can not be the solution to everything.

We have a knife to be used or to be misused. We have a revolver, to be used for your security or to kill anyone. The idea is working behind it. In the case of rape, that is the idea, who is forcing at that moment to do the wrongdoing.

Well, how can one clean the idea? It is not a one day job. It starts with the birth of a person. His/her upbringing plays a major role to develop his/her character.

Seriously, if we think, what we are giving today to future generations? We are forcing our thoughts on them. Today a child is too far from our own culture. Our parents, Our Teachers, in our society all NGOs are struggling to maintain the decorum in one’s mindset. We are being pushed by our parents always to reach the first line. And to reach the first line, we become hard enough to pull the person, who is crossing my line. so this way, actual violence or ill thoughts start from home itself.

The only solution to kill the idea is that move the idea to positivity and spirituality. And this is possible only if parents, teachers, preachers set up their examples to kill all the ill will and do the right things at the right time in the right context.

My thoughts are, we need to go back to basics, where our culture starts growing step by step, and there only we can learn the first lesson of spirituality from our own home.

True Spirituality is the only solution for ill wills. Why I am using the word “True” before spirituality because now everything is adulterated. Even religion, faith, and spirituality. We need to find the True Master, who can show the path of truth to our generation as well as the next generation.

What we will sow today, so we will reap in the future.

Thanks for reading.

Bye-bye, take care and send me your review, as usual, I will answer as soon as possible.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

Suggested Readings:

  1. OILING or SPOILING a Relationship
  2. Is a solution itself a Problem
  3. Nothing is everything

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Diabetic Relationships 7 Sweet Spots

‘Family and diabetes’, is the theme setup for 2019 for World Diabetes Day. Thank GOD, at least intellegent people in the world is now understanding that we as a human could be the reson behind major diseases faces by human itself.

My personal thinking is that the main reason to highlight this theme is just to make every one understand that how important it is for a patient to get support at home.

Every year, November 14 is observed as World Diabetes Day by WHO and International Diabetes Federation (IDF) to mark the birth anniversary of Frederick Banting, who discovered insulin.

WHO (Wold health Organization) described diabetes as epidemic disease in the world. This is a health problem.

Economic liberalisation in India was initiated in 1991 by Prime Minister P. V. Narasimha Rao and his then-Finance Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh, liberalised the Indian economy, allowing it to speed up development dramatically.

But you know that in 1980s intellectuals understood the problem of diabetes are rising rapidly but after 1991, it increased multifold. A lot of junk food introduced in the market and initially there main target was children, but slowly it also captured adults and then it to eat foods rich in sugar, salt and fat, becomes show-off in all regular parties.

Multinational companies purchased potato from our farmers, which was approx 0.25 paise per kg and started selling fried potato chips our public approx Rs 60.00 per kg. And suddely potato shoots up to Rs 10.00 per kg. And farmer’s own children started purchasing packed potato chips from multinationals. This is only one example, where we lost our ground and become slaves with additional diseases, for which they started providing us thier own multinational manufactured medicines on higher rates. They provide us disease so they know the best medicines and we felt ourseleves helpless. All this leads to an epidemic of non-communicable diseases such as hypertension, heart disease and cancer. Well, off course the diabetes stands right on top of them.

When big money started pouring in our houses, our physical activities went down. Members of our families started relaxing and the reslut comes in suprising way. We achieved 100% of increase in diabetec patients. India is one of the 6 countries of the IDF SEA region where 425 million people have diabetes in the world and 82 million people in the SEA Region; by 2045 this will rise to 151 million. There were over 72.946.400 cases of diabetes in India in 2017.

Now come to the main point, from where this blog started. What happened, if a person of a family get diagnosed with Diabetes. Family shattered. They lost hope immediately, they started counting the days of that memeber. In fact, patiened need support, but he or she gets different environment, in his or her own house. When the dietary habits of the patient have to be modified, it is a better option for the rest of the family too have to make changes for themselves also. If patient develops diabetes-related complications like affecting the eye, feet, heart or kidney, the morale of not just the patient but the whole family is affected, which is completly surprising. They even become laughing stocks, when this happens in learned, educated socities.

Gone are those days, when the diabetes was incurable.

I still remember when in a family gathering, where, would be bride, came to know that his would be husband’s father, was having diabetes, she decided not to marry with him and blame game started that it was not told earlier. Why we scared, this does not show any sign of  untouchability or epedemic, but even then our orthodox  ideas make it complicated. Well in some cases it could be heredity, but not all cases. It can be cured with some hard commitments.

When ever i used to visit old age home, i got so many cases, where children leaves their parent just after diagnosing diabetes. Their simple excuse is that they can not take care of them, becase this disease requires more attention and we are working people so we can only shell-out some money to the organization, so they can take care of them.

In one of the old age home, i remember there are a large number of patients living beyond 90+ years of age. If i am not wrong, many have been living with diabetes for 50+ to 60+ years and they aare still doing well without complications.

Today children forget that one day thier children will thorw away in the same way to them here only.

Relations can work like sure shot medicine. This only need a little care, thats all.

1.Regular Medical Checkup Required: 

The meaining of regular means, at least 4 times in a year, not more than that. There are some mandatory test like the eyes, kidneys, heart and feet at least once a year. Early complication dedction may even be reversed. It should not be left uncontrolled. Diabetes can cause havoc in the body, it is even worse than some of the cancers.

2.Develop Healthy Food Habbits: 

Strict vegetarian diet. Green Vegetables, nuts, pulses fruits etc. Especially strct follow up of doctors prescribed diet.

3.Daily Walk or Excercise Regularly:

Member’s of the family can encourage a person to walk or  exercise regularly at least 5 days in a week. Well, this is a suggestion that the family, as a unit, can decide to go for a walk. This will boostup the moral of patienet and you can also have a strict eye to ensure the patient gets the required exercise. And event this is good for health of all members also.

4.Spending Time Together:

Members of the family should think of the way to spend time together. Especially couple. This helps to maintain a healty and positive atitude.  Some of the ways like group Yoga, Group meditation, indoor and outdoor games, are all excellent examples of how a person with diabetes can get support from his family.

5.Strict on Medicine Schedule:

Sometime, it could possible that, patients forget to take their medicines. The reason could be any, but any of the memeber like the spouse or children can remind the patient to do so. 

6.Avoid Stress: 

Remember you are not, who is operating this world. If any other person think in this way, let them do. You try to undersand your limitations. In this world, every one is stressed, and they are looking any easy way to bring it out. And you could be a their victim. So give time to recongnize your self. Be restricted positive. Do mediation regularly.

7.Restriction on Alcohol and Smoke

Memebers of the family should keep a watch to conrol this habbit. This should be big no, as soon as diabetese diagnosed.

Well the theme could be any for this day but i personally believe, this is actually depend more on the personal relationship, than to accept as a mere compulsion between couple.

If a person takes care of his parents, obviously his or her generation learn from them and they will take care of you and also by teaching this,  you are saving your future generation. Because what they will see today , will do tomorrow.

Suggested Readings:

  1. Nothing is Everything
  2. I Love You

Thanks for your reading, do send your reveiws as usual, we will reply as soon as possible. By. Take care.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

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OILING or SPOILING a Relationship

“Trust in Relationship”, If you have seen the logo of our group, you will easily find that this is a tagline of Aaradhya Groups(AGs). An organization that cares for relations. The group is established with a motto to realize everyone the loss of an important feeling nowadays from our life and that is “TRUST”. We are competing with each other in the race of faith but actually we are losing TRUST every second among mankind. 

What is the relation? – Can you guess, we can not live without relation. Try to see near you. You feel the definition of relation was misunderstood by everyone. I and you also include this everyone. 

We feel only living being is connected with relations, but this is not true. Living or Non-Living all are related to us. In living creatures, this is a two-way relationship, but in non-living things, it is one way, but it exists.

Ok, let’s take an example:

First, we take living beings. Well, we have relations with our family, friends, colleagues, strangers. Well, it is always two ways, even, if you do not know the stranger, even then, you have a relationship of non-familiar relationships. 

Now count on non-living things. Do you see, the table has a relation with the chair, but we have a relation with both. We can use a table or chair either altogether or separate each. So non-living things have a relationship between them, but there is one more relationship that exists and that is Non-living with living beings. Right?

Well now come to the most important point “TRUST”. Take an example of a non-living thing first. Suppose you are full of anger and you want to break the head of the person standing in front of you. You don’t have any weapons with you. You are in office, scolding him, calling names, and suddenly you look towards a paperweight, it is lying down in front of you. You picked it up and full of rage, you throw it. Can you guess what happened just now? You have shown full TRUST on that paperweight, by making yourself understand that it will work for me. For the time being, it will become my weapon. 

The pace of life is changing from moment to moment. sometimes we want to catch life, some times life tries to catches us.

A person told me when you are a child, you want to live your own life, but somebody told you, first of all, you need to gain the experience. And You agreed on that so you started following our GODFATHERS.

Sometimes, godfathers are not our idol what we were looking for, again lack of experience becomes obstacles. We changed our godfather again and again and suddenly on the edge of life, we realized we lost something very important and that is TIME.  But actually we gained a precious thing in this duration and that is called “EXPERIENCE”. And that is what we were looking for.

Well, now this is the time when we need to give proper values to our experience because we have not got it through ancestors, we have earned it. And when we are not able to realize the value of experience, then we are also following rat race. 

We know the PRICE of everything but the VALUE of nothing

Suppose, today if we become king alike person, and having all the luxuries, one can think of it. I do not have any person who claps for me, what is the use of this worldly affairs. We realize then only, we have earned nothing. We lost everything if we lost people, we lost our relationship, we lost others’ trust, and the most precious, irrecoverable TIME.

Today, we will try to discuss, all important points how should we strengthen our relationships:

Build trust in relationships:

I am not here to make you remember about any romantic commitment to last, but my intention is to make you remember that TRUST is the base of every relationship. Now the relationship could be a business, Corporate, among friends, relatives, and the most one is a relationship from yourself. The relationship brings two people together. It is not necessary that relationships are only for good relations, even it flows to enemies also. for example: before start hostility, one person should have trust in the second person, that first-person has lost his trust by becoming dishonest. When you are in love with someone, the first step is that your partner earns your trust. Well, if this relationship somehow converts into a long-distance relationship, this is the only feeling, which ties up both with each other. Well, you can say they either mastered themselves the art of TRUST or really they understand each other so much in deep, they do not have distrust on each other. And this happens because, just like love and respect, TRUST has to be earned over and over and should be able to withstand any storm that comes it’s their way.

Here are some points. you should remember to practice:

Value Yourself:

Be honest here and ask yourself, are you feeling often that you are good for nothing? No, it is not a joke and also no need to be too much serious when you are trying to pick up this question. The reason is very simple. Does anybody know who they are? I am sure not. Well if I will say you are a small particle of the source of energy, maybe you will not believe in me. but you will get something more in our previous article “I Love You” And I am sure, after reading it, the first time you will realize and recognize yourself.

When you understand your source, then you will never feel that you are good for nothing. you will start giving value to yourself. You will start loving yourself. You will start respecting you. So the main point is to find your own worth and believe in you.

Have faith in the relationship

Well, here I am not restricting the word partner only to your lover. I am not talking here only for a relationship between a couple Instead of I am talking here for all types of relationships, it could be in every sphere of life with anybody. Well everyone has prior experience with instincts. Well, it is called sometimes the third eye. Something only you can see, only you can realize. But somehow this develops with experience. It is very rare that someone brings this knowledge since birth. 

In general Sixth sense works only for experienced people and this develops trust between a relationship. But what about faith, this is always unconditional. To understand more, I will suggest reading my article “Trust Builts slowly but destroys quickly”

Building trust in a relationship involves creating a strong and genuine love for each other.

Value honesty:

Sometimes actual message lost in communication, so better to cross-check before you believe in that. And another most important thing is to listen honestly and accept the statement honestly. Some time takeaway is misunderstood because we are not listening honestly and this creates mess up. Most of the strongest relationships are built on the foundations of honesty and truth, so make sure you’re doing it right.

Listen Properly:

Do not be judgemental with your prenotions. Maybe your experience is very bad with the person you are dealing with, but it is not always he or she is wrong. We need to listen properly & honestly, then try to collect takeaways. Try to put your foot in client shoes, then only you can get the pain he is suffering from. So this happens only if you listen properly.

Talking on Pain Point is a must

Sometimes petty issues can make huge differences, so this is good to pick up one by one and bury it forever. If we can not talk sense, better not to talk nonsense. It may be possible one partner is suffering, but having patience, which could be a wrong signal to another partner, thinking that you are wrong and feeling guilty for any particular issue. better to talk and make it clear. If need to point out your partner’s mistake do it if need to accept your fault, accept it. 

Resolve issues together

If money lost, it will return, but if the trust is lost, then everything lost. It is very difficult to bring it back. You should be ready to lose everything. And in that case, it is better to settle down either issue or the relationship. There is no meaning to continue in further. Do not let others come between to settle down things in your relationship. Do it yourself, face to face. You should be able to reach at least either end.

Ask questions

“What is in harm to ask?” If you have doubts regarding any of the matters with your partner or you need clarification, you should be proactive and take initiative. Do be the judge without giving the opportunity to another party to clarify. If could not satisfy, ask again, it is your duty to save a relationship and also it is your right to know the truth.

Develop a connection beyond the relationship:

Maturity comes with experience, so initially, this would be a duty for both parties to maintain a relationship, beyond a mare relationship. It should contain trust and belief on each other, never lie, so doubt will not take birth.  enjoy the gettogether frequently, so some offline issues can be clarified.

Life is uncertain, but there are certain things can be maintained by us. 

The best way to do this is, ask below three things in life:

Oh Lord, give me the courage to change the things, what I can change

Oh Lord, give me the courage to accept the thing, which I can not change

Oh lord, give me the wisdom to understand, what I can change or what I can not Change

 

Thanks for reading. Do send your reviews, as usual, I will reply as soon as possible.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

 

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Is Negative Positivity worst?

22nd September 2019. I was watching news on television on the day when Mr. Prime Minister Narendra Modi was busy in “Howdy Mody” program in United States. On the same day news ticker in some news channels were running a breaking news “Now GOD will take revenge with Terrorists in Kashmir?” And these news ticker was highlighting some names of old temples which is being destroyed during last 70 yrs of span, and our central government has announced to taken care of all temples going forward.

I am not a religious person, but definitely a spiritual person and always respect all the religions in the world, because they never teach us anything wrong. We are smart enough to interpret those words with different meaning just for sake of our vested interest. But i started thinking that what should be our first reaction on these types of news or piece of news, how should we really react? Should we react happily or should be react as sad or should we start laugh at? My first thought “Will GOD take revenge”? Is it? I don’t think so. If revenge is taken by GOD is justified than it should be justified by a common man, who believes in GOD and doing all the wrong things in his daily life. What’s wrong in it then? My second thought “Why revenge now? Why it was not stopped at first point, when it was being destroyed by terrorists?” Well this is my personal thoughts, i am not forcing it on anyone to agreed with me.

A person suggested me to be positive in all sphere of life. don’t speak any single word of negativity, if effects the whole life. He gave me example, ‘Do not tell a lie”. This is a negative statement because it is having negates, so it should not be used. Well, when i argued, he has another example “Tell the truth”. This is correct statement.  He was right in his view point, but can not give any answer when i asked him,” Well, then why GOD prepared us to ready to live with odds also”. Every thing in this world has an opposite reaction like the word has opposite words like “Day vs Night”, “Sunlight vs Shade”. “Happiness vs Difficulties”.

Then again he argued “Anand”(आनंद), a word in Hindi language does not have any opposite word. And he was right. In Hindi language they escaped its opposite. But actually if you translate it in English language, the word will translated to “BLISS” and if you search thru search engines, you will find the opposite word “Misery”. It could be possible you will get another word “Ecstasy”, which is called extreme sense of bliss, where you claim, you are enlightened, further you understand the crux of the life like. “All the materialistic world is just for use and you should not attach yourself with it.”  Fair enough. Agreed on their points. 

But again the opposite of this word present in dictionary and this is “Misery”.  Most probably you will get similar type of opposite words in other languages also. I am not sure why Hindi language is exceptional in this case.But even then i will say its opposite word is “Anand Viheen” (आनद विहीन), just for my knowledge.

We forced to live in a fiction world. where every body is having a pure heart. They are noble, kind, truthful and posses all the best qualities, a person can think of it. But again, there is one more person, who posses all bad qualities, and he indulges in all type of bad practices, one can think of it. And this person is called “Villain”. 

We heard all types of moral stories in our childhood around this. One Good man(generally King or Prince), one bad man (generally Demon, it could be male or female). And one princess, who is struggling to get rid of this so called demon or devil and then the prince or the king will come for her rescue. In any of the case King or prince was always handsome and beautiful and same was always true with princess.

And then a bad practice started:

When a girl took birth in any family. Parents tells, “You are a most beautiful lady in this earth”. And when a boy took birth in any family, parent tells “you are the most intelligent person in this earth” And the confusion stars on those days, continues till today. Every girl wants to be a Barbie girl and every boy wants the Barbie girl for him. And both are thinking they deserve it. We become culprit to spoil their whole life by saying a baseless positive thought.

I personally grown up in a family where i never been forced to visit any religious place. We generally visit these places just for fun or just to see the natural beauties. So i am not connected with any fear related to GOD in my mind.

Specially in the families where religious rigidness is the top priority in the daily list, i have experienced these people do not want to hear any other thing, just what they are saying and talking about GOD is correct. This is my personal feeling that actually there growth are restricted, but they do not realize it.

The “Priest” or “Guru” or teacher can not hold growth, but because people respect them like they are GOD for them, so they always try to take best benefits by saying to their children that “You are born to serve people, your birth is only for salvation of the people”, and “You are a selected person, being chosen from all over the world population”. “You are lucky to born in this family, now i will show the path of salvation.”

And hearing these statements, a child started thinking that he or she is similar to GOD, and God has chosen him for any special tasks, which other can not do. As well as they started thinking their teacher as GOD.

Ironically, when we start comparison between Person A and person B, this is a universal truth that unknowingly we already starts giving a slow poison to both persons.

Trust is logical, based on conditions, countable. But Faith throws all logic behind the curtain. Faith is unconditional. Faith don’t accept any logic. If you born in a family where tradition of “GURU-SHISHYA PARAMPARA” is still going on, as a child you do not have to ask any question. You have to trust on their faith and you forced to have faith in all the activities they are doing.

So called Gurus destroying the thousands of lives daily, but we accept it as it is. We do not have any say? Why? Are we blind? Are we deaf? Are we emotional or emotional fool?

A beautiful word, generally is in the air is  “Enlightenment”. Let us discuss a little bit on this?

Take one example that some body got free of cost course on “Enlightenment the Soul” in its corporate office. He attended and found it very useful, because there are a lot of moral speeches, emphasis on moral practices.

Now he wants Clean and pure positive environment for his soul. He suddenly started speaking truth and you can assume his love life started become hell. He simply told the truth, in a simple statement “I never committed with you my dear”. or “I have cheated you several times”. “you are a burden on me”. Since day of marriage, i am thinking that it was better i should commit suicide, instead of married you. Now you can assume, what happened next? Enlightenment from both side. The home become worst place to live in then. Fights starts and ends only with breakup of relationship. What is the use of this type of “Enlightenment”, Do we really need it?

Mahatma Buddha left her wife and children for seeking enlightenment. Why? Any answer?. Maybe he knew the real truth, but we know only stories told by historians. We never go beyond it in search of truth.

The real enlightenment is just to live your life with in your family, where you are facing day to day issues and working on solution for all type of problems. You try to align all the issues with in the members of the family. You need not to have an experience of a civil war. you are facing it on daily basis. And the real fact is that you know the real meaning of “PEACE”, which no body knows. Not only a single preacher in this world.

Recently, i read an interesting blog written by Author : Charlotte Laws  titled “How a Guru and a Measly Vowel almost destroyed my love life.” She asked a simple question to her fiancee if you have already enlightened, then why you are going again and again to your Guru for enlightenment. It should be only one time practice. Neither Guru have had the satisfactory answer nor pupil knew that. This question saved her love life and now both are married couple after two years of struggle.

If you know the destination, why are you running, just walk daily for some miles, you will reach at least.

But if you don’t know the destination, why are you running. Stop, think, analyze and finalize, and then only move slowly.

My personal experience is that  “To be extreme positive is actually following a harsh negativity”. Because at this stage positive thoughts become poison.

Give a room to you to hear negative thoughts, negative ideas. because it is impossible that everything in this world is positive. I have seen people published their issues in social media, because somewhere they want every one tell them to stick with positivism. But they do not want to accept in public that they are feeling negativity. Negativity is a truth. You can not run from it. Negative thoughts are around. 

Critics are equally important in all sphere of society, welcome them. Embrace them, love them. They are only person, who force you to find the real path. Don’t ignore them. They are your real assets.

Just remember darkness is always everywhere. Only light can remove darkness for some time, as soon as light goes out, the darkness appear.Which means darkness never gone anywhere. It is still always be there and here.

In same way, actually negativity exists, and for the time being my positivism can take place for a while but as soon as it gone from my mind, every thing remains same. So better accept the negativity, work on it. You will feel better, i bet.

Think today: Where GOD dwells in you? Is it your “Mind?” Or is it your “Heart”?

Thanks for reading. Send your reviews as usual, i will answer to each one.

Bye, take care of yourself, relatives, near and dear ones

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

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Trust builts slowly but destroys quickly

A famous saint used to live his livelihood by weaving cloths. He has to work many days and nights to prepare one sheet of cloth. Everybody knows that whatever the situation maybe he will not get angry. He was famous to analyze the situation find the problem and then try to find the solution.

One day a mischevious person bet among his friends and took up a challenge. He told all of his friends, “Today I will show you, how fake he is and how he will get angry today?”

When the saint reached to market, that person immediately approached him and started asking price of the full sheet of cloth. The saint told him the price, but that person insisted, “I want to see the whole sheet before purchasing”. One of the pupils accompanying with the saint, open the sheet of the cloth. That person asked for a pair of scissors and started cutting the cloth into two-part, then again he asked,” What is the price now?”.

The saint immediately understood his intentions but replied calmly the half of the price.  That person immediately picked up the pair of scissors and tore the cloth again into two parts. And again asked for the price. The saint smiled and told him again half of the price from the previous price. That person again picked up the pair of scissors and again started doing the same process.

The pupil was surprised to see that the buyer was tearing his sheet of cloth again and again into half, without the intention of purchasing and the saint was smiling and was telling him price every time. When the process completed and now there was no scope left to tear off the cloth one more time in half, that person stood up and told to the saint, “I am sorry, I do not want to purchase your cloth” The saint smiled again and replied “Its Ok. No issues. As you wish”.

When the person left the place, the pupil asked surprisingly, “You know that he was a mischievous person and he was playing with you. But why you have not reacted? He has destroyed your hard-earned money” The saint smiled that there are two things, “First, he came here with one strong trust on me that I will not become angry in any situation”. “And I tried to build his trust stronger”. “And second, you told right that he destroyed my two weeks hardworking and I have nothing left for next two weeks as an earning. He destroyed my today, but actually, today, he destroyed his future by showing his upbringing.”

Trust can not be enjoyed alone. It is a bilateral relationship. There should always be two parties to start with. When you read in your text bok the friction between two stones can bring fire out from stone. Had you believed that? No, not at all, at least at first time. But when your subject teacher told you the same story, you trust him a little bit but not on the full story. But when you have seen first time by himself or herself, then only, you immediately trusted on the textbook, and the words told by your teacher. The reason is you experienced himself the same you read. so the Trust is calculative. Trust needs proof.

The main difference between faith and trust is that the trust is conditional and faith is unconditional.

You can have faith in GOD, but before starting an airplane journey, you try to get maximum information from all sources about the pilot, about his past experience in flying a Boeing Plane. especially the number of successful journies completed and reason for unsuccessful journies. Actually, you want to be more sure, that you have trust in him.

There are two major dimensions, in front of people before they make decisions on trust. Preconscious, where a person already made half decision with his own beliefs, or experiences or stories heard in childhood. So, in that case, fifty percent decision is already taken by his brain. 

Second is a conscious decision, means calculative and conditionals. It is a slow process. If the condition is agreed to calculation, only then trust starts, but as soon as one condition fails, the trust started shaking and started dropping very quickly.

Trust is built with consistency. Like drops coming in a bucket through tap can fillup bucket only after consuming one whole day, and if the bucket has one hole in it then, in that case, it can take up to one month, and sometimes even the feasibility would be it maybe or maybe not.

In today’s world, trust is used as one of the most valuable currencies among humans. Can you assume to build any relationship without this with anyone? Obviously not?.

Among every relationship, trust is working somewhere in between. People do business, just because of the trust factor. We get married, we pay online payments, we purchase some items, you pay to expensive services, etc..etc… just because of the trust factor.

Well, whatever you want to achieve in your life, don’ start with developing networking, start with building trust among your network. The network will automatically develop.

As earlier said, trust can not work with a single party, it needs two to make four. It takes a lot of time to build. The whole process of gaining trust starts with understanding first. If you do not know a person, how can you trust him?

But this is also the part of the process that a single wrong or unmatured action can ruin any relationship you’ve built over a period of time within seconds.

To understand this you need to understand human behavior.

  1. The human needs to be caring even if he does not want to care.
  2. All humans are internally wired for connection but they disconnected deliberately.
  3. All humans want to feel important.
  4. Most humans like the same things.
  5. Most humans want to trust the same things.
  6. Most humans don’t want to initiate, they prefer to wait.

These are some common behaviors, you can find more.

Every new trust-building process will convert existing trust into a strong belief.

Don’t trust me, trust yourself, believe in yourself only.

Thanks for reading, do send your reviews as usual.

Bye-bye, take care

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com

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Nothing is Everything

BLOG

Recently, during my stay in Bangalore, India. I used to go to have my breakfast between 7:00-7:30 a.m. in my favorite restaurant “New Flavor”, which is just near my place where I was staying. I noticed at the same time three young smart guys used to join me almost every day, dressed lightly blue color shirt and dark blue jeans. Initially, I could notice one thing only that without asking their orders, a similar type of breakfast served to them by restaurant staff daily. I never found them talking to each other.

One fine day, I found there was some discussion going on among three, but the language they were using was sign language. In multiple cities I have seen people serving NGOs, trying to learn sign language to enhance their skill to interact with people having such issues. Generally, I found then practicing this in public places only.

My first thought was the same for all these three young chaps. But when I enquired the same with restaurant staff, then only I could get the information that they all are deaf and not able to speak. But they are quite comfortable in their life. They all were in jobs and enjoying life. They don’t have any complaint from life.

Those who have the only complaint from life was, “Can anyone of us assume to spend only one day in our life with these deficiencies? And the answer is well known, “Can’t think of it”. Right?

After groping in the dark, if you see the light, you know the value of light, because you know the pain of darkness. But what happened if you well equipped with light since birth, then the value of light is obviously do not have value to you. This is the time when you should force yourself to understand the pain of darkness, then only you can understand the value of light.

Today people know the price of everything and value of nothing.

Second and very important thought came into my mind is, “How a language can become a barrier for global development when it is the most important means for all of us to communicate with each other?”

In general, the people of the whole world is divided by ourselves through useless barriers like geographical demarcations, gender, language, color, caste, creeds, body structure, skin, etc. But when we look into deep in our heart, we all are same.

Well, we cannot say that every thought process done by our ancestors were wrong. They have done a wonderful job, but manipulators won easily when a large group of people becomes a toy of a handful of diplomatic people.

After the division of India & Pakistan, a Sikh family came from Lahore to Delhi. They were refugees. At that time a lot of promises done by Government for all refugees, but it never fulfilled due to the unreliable source of database. Real refugees never get their piece of bread, they understand that they have to earn it by themselves.  The family was completely shattered. They were having two boys and two girls in the family. Somebody suggested the groom from Punjab living in Delhi, for their elder daughter. Head of the family immediately agreed, even the girl was minor. The rationale behind was simple that she can at least get the full-time meal for the rest of her life.

The elder daughter was very hard working. She adjusted with everyone in the family, even she came to know later that her husband was daily drunker. The day came when she purchased a piece of land and then she started dreaming to develop her own home, sweet home on it. In between, she gave birth to her four children. All grown up and happily living life. When one day they shocked to get the information that their father is no more now. Their mother got a huge sum of amount because their father was having some deals finished a few days back and got a huge profit from it.

Mother of four immediately started constructing a two-story building named “Prem Sadan” (A house where love dwells). Building constructed and she allotted each one portion to all fours children and kept one portion in middle for her. Everybody was happy. Then she has decided to marry all of her children one by one.

And the doom days started. Eldest son was about to marry, then the news came the second son has already selected his bride and if his elder brother delayed, he was ready to marry before him. On those days, it was treated as a bad omen. So the mother decided to go for a quick marriage for his eldest son first. Both got married. Everything was running smoothly until the decision taken for the marriage of her third son. Soon after the marriage of her third son, trifles started in home front about pity issues among all three daughters-in-law. Mother tried to resolve the issues, by distributing the day to day household work at home among all, but the third son’s wife knows very well that how a mole can be converted into a mountain. She knows how to manipulate all the words in front of her husband and how to play tricks to raise disputes.

And then the final bout faced by mother direct on her face, when informed by her third son that he wants the division of property legally. Mother knew that somebody was smiling from her back. She tried to convince all her sons that she has already given to them their portions of the property, where they are living happily, then why they want division legally? But this time nobody wants to listen to her. And she did not want to fight anymore, she was growing old now. This was the last day of her life when she saw the boundary walls are being raised in “Prem Sadan”. Prem, the LOVE vanished among all and it was clubbed in the cage again. The effort did by her, the whole life, to make a beautiful home was destroyed and the home was converted into a house, some walls, some boundaries some windows, some doors, just by some meaningless, crooked ideas and greed and a big EGO.

Now come to the point, you can assume our earth as a whole sweat home, where the demarcations done by our ancestors to live a happy life. It was a geographical division. We never understood when this geographical division become the basis of partition among our hearts.  Just because some people want to satisfy their ego, just to show their presence to the whole world, started eating our independence with their meaningless provocative words and became our leaders. Thinking that they are our well-wishers, some of us followed them and today everywhere we can see fights, arsenal, hate, apathy, just because they want to rule on the world through us. The beautiful home is converted into chaos, and everything is messed up. We wanted to live our dream, but in reality, we became the victim and till today they are using us to living up their own dirty inspirations and dreams.

There is a thumb rule, to live, and to leave this world is that whatever you possess either to use it or distribute it. There is no way to take away from this earth any single piece or item.

I personally wanted to write a book on the topic “Peace of Mind”. When I was thinking about, it was very clear in my mind that people should satisfy somewhere with what they have in their hand. They should try hard to get whatever they want to achieve, but should not connect their failure with the final outcome of the result. But suddenly I got the vibes, “If we have peace of mind, why should we run for materialistic things”. Then another vibe ran into my mind, “why should not? Why one should make himself satisfy, with what he possesses?. We are living in this world, where a lot of people do not have what we have, so better to do something for them. And to achieve this goal, we have to make ourselves dissatisfied. Do something good for those. And only then we will get a final “Peace of Mind”, within us.

Sometimes when we run behind a specific task, but unable to achieve something satisfactory. Then we feel like we have finished a long marathon just for nothing. And this is time, when the first time we feel, we have to do more specific research to understand our failures. After gearing up, again we start running behind our task wether we face failure again and again.

“There is no failure except in no longer trying”.

Sir James Dyson failed 5126 times within 15 yrs. before he succeeded to invent bagless vacuum cleaner. Thomas Edison was told by his teachers he was “too stupid to learn anything”. Theodor Seuss Geisel, known to “Dr. Seuss”, much-loved children author has his first book rejected by 27 publishers.

 There are thousands of examples all over the world present today for us, and we are following blindly. But you know, there is one more truth behind that, is, those who completed their tasks, are in limelight, but thousands are those, who never come into the picture.

Failures do not have any counts, but a successful person gets limelights.

  What the purpose is behind to mention above is very simple. There is a very thin line between “Lets Go” and “Let it Go”.

Once you are ready to accept that, life becomes easy for you. You don’t learn to grab anything since birth, but you need to learn to let it go. And this is not a science, this is a practice, and to do this you need to learn, what you know and what you don’t know?

The problem starts only when “Knowledge” converts into “Ego”. If you are thinking that you are the doer and you are the only person, who can do it, then your ego pulls you behind. The person surrounded by you immediately senses that you are pulled by ego and they started trying to make a distance from yourself.

When you surrender by accepting, you are nothing, but you are chosen to complete this task and this task is not benefited only you, but this will be benefited to entire mankind, then every person, who may be more knowledgeable or less knowledgeable and including every particle in this universe starts serving you and support you.

In my recent air trip, I got a window seat in airbus and when the landing started, I peeped out from the window. The earth was looking like a city of a small fairy tale, where we have small decorated houses, clean black roads, trees were flourishing alongside, small milky color lights were spreading from the center of the roads. Small vehicles like car, truck, bikes, scooters, etc. plying on the road.

And then I started thinking about where we people are? Oh yes, got it. A small creature like entity, moving slower than an ant on the pavement. And my mind flashed with thoughts. When we are looking at ourselves from the top, we can see we are nothing. Actually we are smaller than a mosquito. But as soon as we are coming closer to our land, we start to compare ourselves with existing entities. Then we become “Something”. Go a little more deep in these thoughts with me. When we found ourselves surrounded by other entities, then we started comparing ourselves and this thought generates superiority complex. And this superiority complex is a generator of our EGO.

If we are far from our earth, our properties, our relationships, our wealth, our positions, we fly high, when we are connected with nothing. But we grounded ourselves when we are connected with all of them and forget how to live and how to leave.

So enjoy with nothing. Because in a real sense nothing is everything.  

Thanks for reading. Do send your reviews, I will respond as soon as possible.

Bye, take care of yourself, your relatives, friends, and your near and dear ones

Regards

Neeraj Bhatia

 

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99….& Counting Starts Again

When I was in class 5th in my school named Bal Vidya Mandir, Lucknow. There were two books in Hindi Syllabus. “Bal Sahitya Mala” and “Saral Bhasha”. Today I don’t remember the name of the book in which I read that story named “Kuber ka chakra” (The wheel of KUBER). Well, Kuber is famous as “GOD of Money” in India.

I don’t want to discuss here the existence of GOD Kuber. But I want to point out, what I could not understand at that time, but when I saw all this story practicing in practical society, I could understand that our ancestors were really very wise and they knew that how to save the next generation. This purpose is invisible now. Everyone is living his own life. Nuclear families are increasing day-by-day. Today’s generation does not care about their parents, then, how can we think that they will care for the next generation.

Some years ago, I was in Delhi, and I have seen an old richest lady of a posh colony, was busy with some of her workers in her garden. I was curious to know what is going on. When they identified me there, they called me to come and see what is going on. To find that I am curious enough to understand the whole process, they told me that we are sowing “Walnut Tree”. I was inexperienced in agriculture so my straight question was, “When it will give fruit?”. That lady laughed and said. “Your generation always looking for results in the next minute.” I felt ashamed. But I again asked the same question. One person told me,” It will take 7 to 8 years”.

I was surprised to hear that. “How can you assume that you will alive to enjoy its fruit”, that was my direct question to that lady. But when she asked me, the same question in the same tone, I could not give an answer. She asked,” How are you sure, I will not be alive to enjoy its fruit.?”

Since childhood, I was a very curious person. I quickly started looking for a person, who can give me the answer. Then I visited one of my mentors, and a great philosopher “J.R.D. Satyarthi”. He generally called me with the nickname “Young Blood”. When he saw me, he simply asked, “You will not be here alone, what is your question”. I really always appreciated his gesture. I put my question in front of him.

He smiled and asked, “What is the time of happiness?”. I laughed and thought this is a very simple question, and the answer is also simple. I answered, “For me only two times in a year”. “First in ‘Diwali” and second in “Holi”. Now this time he laughed, and asked “Have you understood the question?”, “I am not asking for festivals”, “My question is different”.

I understood, his definition of happiness would be different. But suddenly I remember something and shouted, “I know that”. He curiously looking for an answer. His voice was calm, “Yes, I am listening”. I told “Today”. I was thinking that I have given a philosophical answer to a philosopher and my answer is perfectly right. But he nodded his head in negative, and told “No”.

He said, “You can not catch today alone”. “Today is always a mixture of past and future”. You learn from the past, live in present and plan for the future with some goals.” “Isn’t it?” “Is it possible you can happy today with these two burdens on your head”?

I nodded my head left and right and surrendered, “I don’t know the answer”. He smiled and said politely, “One second before death is the happiest moment of our life”. Now I almost jumped, “But how will I know, the next second is the moment of my death”. He smiled again and reiterated and said: “Even I don’t know”. “Then”, I was adamant to understand the reason behind this answer. And then he gave me a divine knowledge, which is difficult to get in books, you can get only from your experience or from any experienced person only.

He told, “When that old lady was sowing walnut, even she didn’t know if she will be alive or not, but the fact is that you are also not sure if she will be dead or not”. Because birth and death are not in our control.

Ironically, this definition is challenged by some people who nowadays going for cesarean delivery for the birth of their child, and majority decision is just to ensure about their child should take birth in specific day or month and also you can say that people murder people or un-timely death is rising to take control of birth and death of their hand instead of GOD’s hand. This is nothing but living against natural life and also this is like that some people are intruding GODs territory. Well, we will discuss the impact of this later in our other blog.

He emphasized, “I am giving you two-point to live a real-life “Always remember”,

  1. “When you meet someone, the greeting should be like that your greeting with this person is the first time in your life”. And maybe you will never get a second chance in this life for this greeting”
  2. “When you leave anyone, leave as you will never meet with this person anymore in your life and this is your last day or last moment of your life”. You need to practice it on a daily basis, even if you are meeting with the same person the next day.

I was cold frozen. These two statements are easy to read but much difficult to practice in one’s life. You can follow only if you believe in the existence of GOD and also if you accept that all acts are driven by GOD, you are not a doer. Do you know the difference when a person is in “Love” and when he is in an “Enamored” state?

Now come to the point, where this blog starts. The story of “Kuber ka chakra ” goes like this:

A person was passing from a lane, but suddenly he saw that another person is sitting on a hill, which is quite far from his lane. But surprisingly, a wheel was running on his head and that wheel has a pointed sharp piercing nail, a big nail. Which pierced into his head and blood was flowing continuously from his head. He was bleeding badly. His all cloths were blotted and filled up with bloodstains.

He was sitting too far, up on the hill. It was very difficult to reach him, the way was not straight. It was slippery and full of curves. But at last, he reached. He saw that the person was silent. He was not speaking any word. He is bleeding, but there were no marks of pain on his face.

He thought this is strange, he is bleeding but having no pain. He decided to ask him questions. He reached near him and started asking, “What is your name?”. That person told, “My name is Satya Prakash”. Second question, “How many days you are here?”. The person answered, “From last 40yrs”. The third question, “How you survive here means what do you eat?”. The person told, “Nothing, I don’t feel hunger or thirst”. Fourth Question, “I can see that the wheel is piercing and it is continuously running round and round, and in every round, it throws a lot of your blood from your head”. “How this is possible that you spend 40 yrs in this condition and blood is not finished from your body. The person answered,” I will never die and I will never get a shortage of blood.” The fifth question, “Do not you feel any pain?” The person answered, “Yes, only headache”. The sixth question, “Can I help you in any way?” The person said, “No, you can not”, you can leave now, No one can help me”

Now he is completely confused. And he decided to ask the last and very important question. He avoided this question a lot, but now he decided to ask at last. He asked, “How this happened to you?” As soon as he asked this question, the wheel flew to him and placed on his head and started taking rounds. He started feeling a headache. He started bleeding from his head.

He shouted perplexedly, “Why it happened to me?” “I just wanted to help you”. The person told, “I warned you to leave the place, but you did not”. He asked, “How can I get rid of it? The person told, “Only when any person the same as you, will come to you and ask the same question, you asked from me, then you will be free. Now you will not feel hunger, thirst and you will never die, your age will be stopped here only. Ok bye bye thank you, you made me free” And the person left.

It is a very painful story at that age for me. I could not understand it. But, I got its answer only when I started practicing with society and become a part of society. Now try to understand between the lines. It is really very interesting.

In our career or our business, we always try to follow those, who are better than us. Those who already became rich, or living luxuries life, always fascinates us. We fascinate by increasing numbers of USD Dollar. And nowadays social media add fuel to our aspirations by flashing big numbers. but actually, maximum news is fake news or such type of advertisement, where a user forced to believe that everything is fact.

And here the problem starts. When we see anyone, becoming rich, we try to follow him ( In the story he is on the hill for us, very difficult to reach to him). We try to approach him, to understand, how he becomes rich (Questions asked). From his experience he tried to make us understand, don’t fall in the trap. It is a painful process. (the bleeding head and wheel). But when we could not understand and adamant to understand the process, then he explains everything and the money wheel jump on us.

We become our victims ourselves. While you are busy with earning money, you will not get sleep, you will not feel hunger and thirst. You get always a headache. You will not die, because first of all your aspirations need to die, only then you will die. You just want to do the same process again and again to earn more money and more money. This is called a money trap, you earn money and count till 99 and some unexpected expense suddenly comes which consumes all of your savings(99) and then again you start from 1 (In the Hindi language it is called “99 Ka Fer”) just to pursue 100. And this continues till death.

I remember the story written by Leo Tolstoy “How much land does a man need?” If you have not read the story, I will suggest to go through and understand how greed can make the life of a man hell.

Once I asked on phone one of my childhood friends Rajendra, “So, how is Lucknow?’. He answered without any new thought, “My wife is happy, my children are happy, I am happy”. “If my family is happy, means Lucknow is growing and very good”.

In a small statement, he enlightens me on the moral of life. Why we are earning? Just to be happy with family. Then why greed, and lust? Sometimes billion dollars give us the sleepless nights but a hardworking farmer or labor never misses his sleep. And they found them always happy because they do not have anything to lose. And for sure, money can not buy happiness. Agree….???

Thanks for reading. Do send your reviews. I will answer you as soon as possible.

Be happy, with you, yourself, family, relatives, friends and near and dear ones.

Regards, Take care.

Neeraj Bhatia

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Which side of the GOD is?

 

In Punjab, the Majha region, Gurdaspur is a district, where one of my farmer friends residing with his family. He has two daughters. Both got married. One day he thought I need to visit both of my daughters today. He visited his elder daughter first. Her husband was having the business of making clay pitchers and selling it in nearby markets. When he was about to leave, he asked her daughter, “Do you want anything”? She told, “Only one thing, please pray to GOD, that rains should be delayed, so at least our raw clay pitchers get dried”. To sell them in the market is only our earnings”.

On the same day, he visited the younger daughter’s house. Her husband was a farmer. Everything was okay. He was very happy. He asked the same question to her younger daughter “Do you want anything”? She told “Nothing, but, please pray to GOD, that rains should be on proper schedule time, else, our plants get dried and we can not earn anything this year.

My friend was confused, which side the GOD is? How is it possible that GOD can help both of my daughters.

Are you facing the same issue, in your Life? Can you give me a solution? whose side GOD will be?

In the year 2005, I was in Mumbai. Generally, I used local trains for destinations. Because to go long routes through road and stuck in a traffic jam for hours was always a foolish decision. I used four-wheelers only for night drives or for my trips outside Mumbai.

I was staying in Malad (West), the day when havoc happened in Mumbai, unfortunately, I was there. It was 26th July 2005, when the rain started and for the next 10 days, it never decreases its speed. I never kept so many eatables in my refrigerator or storage. When it started, I thought it will take maybe the next 24 hours to stop. or rain will slow down and shops will open. And I will get something to eat.

But I was wrong, it continued for a couple of days. Mumbai was on a halt. Everybody was stuck where they were. Offices started to drown, homes melted down like anything. Thousands for Mumbai people were on roads or spread on railway tracks because all the local trains were on a halt. Public transports including private taxi drivers increased fare prices multi-folds. Public Buses were stuck in the middle of the road, all are half-drowned in water. Television was airing information minutes by minutes and after some time electricity failed for the entire city. ATMs run out from currencies, dried out. Some machines were out-of-order with error description “non-functional”. I was feeling hungry, but can not go out, because of heavy rain and lashing wind. Online or mobile orders for food were rejected. Then slowly mobile charging got off. Communication was halt completely. The whole of Mumbai was at the mercy of GOD.

The same situation continued for the next 9 days. Thousands of people were drowned. Many parts of the Mumbai was half-drowned. One of my friends trying to save another friend pulled down by the water. I forget my hunger for those days. If I could hear anything on those days, that was only crying. for all of those, whom I was never familiar with. But I was melted down by their heart-throbbing cries.

I found myself always lucky, and this time also I was. The floodwater reached only till Goregaon station and before it reached to Malad station, the rain stopped. On that day as soon as the rain stopped along with my friend. I rush towards nearby places to collect the stock of the situation.

I was on my two-wheeler. I do not want to tell a lie here, my first preference was to see if any hotel, any shop is started preparing food, or can we get anything which can be eaten immediately.

Wandering to find food, we reached near Goregoan(W) station. Everywhere water and water. All roads were flooded with water. Home dashed to grounds. We can see utensils, clothes, electric and electronic appliances, money, educational certificates were floating on the water.

And then I have seen first dead body, swollen with water. And then second and third and so on. I cried aloud. “What the hell is it? How can GOD do that? Suddenly, I have seen some more dead bodies but they have cuts on their bodies. Some bodies didn’t have hands, some didn’t have fingers. I was shocked to see that. Then I have seen dead bodies of children floating on water.

My friend was a local resident of Mumbai. I asked him how it is possible? How can rain cuts somebody’s hands, or neck or fingers? He kept his eyes down. I understand he had an answer but he is hesitating. And then, when he started telling the truth, my eyes getting wide opened, with surprise and anyone can see the combination of anger, pain, and sorrow in it.

He told me there are some people who are so selfish, that they never leave any opportunity to loot. I believe as soon as these houses dashed grounded and people started crying for help. These goons took advantage and tried to pull out their ornaments from their bodies. Everyone can not be a good swimmer. But these goons are well trained in it. Here you can see, some necks and fingers are cut down because maybe bodies are old more than 24 or 48 hours and are swollen, they found it very hard to get their ornament to be pulled out, so they cut their hands, neck, ears or fingers. But in some cases, this is also possible that when somebody is asking for help, then instead of giving the help they cut them from throats, so they can collect their ornaments, etc.

What an inhuman and insensitive act? Disgusting…My emotions were so high that If I could have a sword in my hand and if I could get them in front of me, definitely I would cut these goons in pieces, to make sure they are not alive.

But the question here is again? Which side the GOD is?

One day I did catch my train from Dadar station. It was late evening. It was a harbor lane. I saw a group of ladies entered in second class compartments having big cane baskets on their heads. They were having some fruits in them, and most probably they return after selling it in another station market.

I observed all ladies put their baskets on the ground of the compartment, but one lady kept it on her head only. Curiously, I asked, “where are you going?”. One of them told the name of the station. I wondered, it is too far, and it will take approximately 35 more minutes. I simply asked, “You know how much time train will take to reach there”, they told the same estimated time. Then again I asked, “why she is not grounding her basket”, “why she is keeping it on her head”. Other ladies laughed at her and said, she will not. My surprise was increasing second by second. I asked again, “Why?”. Another lady said because she is thinking that she should not increase the load on the train. And she is reducing a load on the train by keeping his burden to herself. I never heard that logic before. I wanted to convince her, she is wrong, but somehow kept quiet. They were speaking in the Marathi language, which I was not well versed.

But I started thinking, for the public it is a foolish act, but in my senses, it was an innocent act. She is so kind by heart, she can not give trouble to anyone in her life.

But the takeaway from this incident was remarkable. The same situation is happening with us on a daily basis. We are taking all the loads on our heads, but not leaving it to GOD. Maybe we have a doubt, which side the GOD is?

On the rout of my office, generally every morning I can see a huge rush of the public waiting to board on public or private buses. As soon as, the bus arrives, a huge bunch of crowd started struggling to enter from the entry gate. They tried to push others backward, so they can get inside, and the haste is only because they want to grab a seat. There is no mercy for old people and ladies or children. But when they were pushed back by others, they again started trying but at last, when they are stuck in the crowd and pushed back again and again, then they leave it on GOD, felting helpless, there all efforts get failed just due to others overpower them. Similarly, in our life, we try hard to use all of our power to be fulfilled our dreams, but when we failed repeatedly then only we leave everything on GOD.

In my view, this concept should be reversed now. Leave everything on GOD and then try hard. I am sure, you will be succeeded.

A student usually entering from the front gate of the college, find side gate open today, this was restricted but just to save her time, she entered from that gate swiftly as no attendant was there to stop him. Suddenly, she realized all other students are exchanging greetings. She was surprised. She was thinking of what happened today? Am I different today? I come to college every day, but nobody recognizes me, but what happened suddenly, I am famous overnight. Everybody has a single sentence today “Good Morning Mam”. And suddenly she realized, I have taken different paths today, maybe side lane is especially for VIP type of students or something else. Anyways, she felt proud and try to show that she is VIP. Sometimes she waved her hand and accepted greetings from the student by slightly bowing her head down.

She became conscious when she realized the senior teachers also bow their heads and said “Good Morning Mam”, and then the first time she moved towards the backside to see if there is anyone, who is walking along with her. And to her surprise, it was her College Dean, who is walking behind her. And in a surprising situation, she bowed her head to exchange greetings with her.

This was her time to understand, that all greetings were for College Dean Mam, and she was thinking that it was for her.

We are doing the same mistake again and again in our life, thinking that we are the doer for all types of acts in our life, but actually, the doer is GOD and we are taking all the credits.

When we surrender our all efforts to GOD, then suddenly we started getting all, what we never think of our dreams.

I was sitting in my office on my desk, and in front of my desk, one of my senior colleagues was sitting. One of our office colleagues entered from the main door in our room and she bowed the head and threw her smile towards us. My senior college has exchanged greeting by saying a long “Hi”. Simultaneously I smiled at her. She smiled but I realized only when a strong voice swims in the air from my backside with greeting “Hello”, that she is exchanging her greeting to her boss, who was sitting just behind me on the sofa set. It was neither for me nor for my senior colleague. But actually, she got three smiles when she was expecting only one from his boss only.

Now come to the main point, from where this BLOG started.

Which side of GOD is? We have seen in all of our above-mentioned incidents, we don’t have any direct interaction or communication with GOD.

Well, from where you will get a direct mobile, or cell number of GOD, who will give you? Do you have any agent’s contact number?

I was a very weak student in the 5th class. And especially in Geography subject, I never understand the difference between latitude and longitude. I need to write a class test on a monthly basis. And the day of the result, my class teacher calls the name and announces the marks obtained. I was the only person who knew his obtained marks in advance. So it was my developed habit, that I need to call all the names of GOD, and requested them multiple times, to give me just pass marks this time only and promised them that I will work hard for next time.

But every time my prayers spins in the air without any results. Every time I felt ashamed and murmurer that GOD is helpless and can not do anything.

It was class eighth, when first time, I heard the statement, “GOD helps those, who help themselves”. And this was the first time I started thinking in a different way. I have had experienced multiple times that all the prayers are of no use. GOD never replied either an affirmative nor negative. Actually, he never answers and my all prayers were unanswered to date.

That was the turning point of my life when I started believing in myself. I started working hard on me and till today, that boy who was very very weak in Geography subject has already completed his visit for the 27th country last year. So, at last, GOD started helping me, when I started helping myself.

Now, summarize the whole article. In spiritualism, it is very clear that we are surrounded by supreme energy. And those who know that, what it is? They understand life. Those who know the definition of GOD, can understand very smoothly, where is GOD, and whom I am talking about here.

In religious places, have you ever seen GOD speaks? No, I am with you. But actually when we heard a statement that “He is the person, from whose body, GOD speaks”. Why GOD need any other body to speak? Agreed. This statement is nothing but showing the experience of life for the person in the subject.

GOD is omnipresent. GOD is LOVE. GOD never favors or disfavor. GOD knows only justice.

A person, who is asking GOD, to help others, don’t have self-interest behind this prayer. And he is a pure heart person. He has nothing to do if GOD fulfills his wish or not. Because he is not asking for himself. He is asking for another person. He doesn’t care.

From today onwards, if you start asking help on any issue from GOD, always ask for all mankind, and just leave the decision on him that if this is good for us or not. The request would be simple, “I don’t know what is good and bad for me, I don’t know, how to pray, and I don’t know which is good for me, so if this is good for me please fulfill it, else you know better what is good for us.

Do you know what happens actually here? Simple, you and your family also counted in whole mankind. So do not be self-interested by asking GOD to favor you only. If it will good for the entire mankind, it will be fulfilled, if not then leave it to him. Have Faith.

Now, if anyone asking you to pray for his or her best. Start to pray for the entire mankind. How can you ask a favor for anyone, when GOD don’t like favoritism.

Thanks for reading.

Please send your reviews, as usual, I will answer as soon as possible for all of your questions.

Bye-bye,

Take good care of you, yourself, relatives, friends, and all near and dear ones.

Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia [ Direct Email ID: neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com]

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Corporate Lipstick

Corporate Lipstick
SMILE – The Lost Diamond, The Lost Treasure

A young boy from a village reached to Bangalore city, an IT Hub, a Silicon city in India. A dream city for persons, who are perusing their career in Information Technology. After graduation, this was the first job he got offered and have no idea, where he is going, where he will stay. With his bag and baggage, he reached a corporate office, with a job offer letter in his hand. Young receptionist welcomes him, by saying a long “Hi…”. They offered him a seat on the reception lounge and told to wait. He was very surprised to see huge beautiful buildings, facilities, and decorations. This was a dream for him which comes true.

While waiting, he realized, that there is something very confusing. Some people saying “Hi”, some people yelling long “Hi…”. Some people were shouting “Hello”. Some people were shaking hands with each other, some giving short hug to each other, some hugs are very long and friendly and some were rubbing cheek to cheek, but only left or right cheek and some are rubbing both cheeks together.

How I came to know all this? Because I was sitting in the same reception and waiting for my client. And that office was a big branded giant and I was an employee there then.

 When he shared his thoughts with me, I tried to satisfy him by saying that this is a headquarter of our company and from all over the world, international employees visit here. Every country has a different greeting culture, that’s why he can see a lot of direct verities of greetings gestures.

I was trying to make him satisfied, but a very genuine question took birth in my mind and I was revolving around it to find an honest answer.

Do we exchange our greetings in real nature, nowadays? When was last time our heart met with other’s hearts? Are we habitual to exchange fake smiles to each other? When we smile last time which was real in nature?

I took my office place two months before. One of their office staff is heading to the sales department. Sometimes I got interacted with her. I always found her stressed. She is very ambitious, hardworking, and wholehearted devoted to career. It took no time for me to understand that she was afraid of the loss of a job, she was insecure about her career aspirations. So always try to push herself hard. It seems she is compromising with a lot of things in her life. I never saw a genuine smile on her face. It does not mean she never smiles. She smiles a lot, but I can sense the difference between a cosmetic smile and genuine smiles. Her “Hi” doesn’t have any meaning. Her “Hello”, was always purposeful, like she is looking for more business from you or this is just a formality.

Last week of this month, I had a great experience. We have a musical event on the office premises. I told her something about her favorite Bollywood numbers, which she used to listen some time back. She never expected that information from any stranger. In a surprising voice, she asked me how I knew this.

Deliberately I did not give her answer, something was in my mind at that time, and I was expecting something. And yes, it happened. Before leaving to the office for the day, she glimpsed toward me and laughed for a while, genuine laugh. I can realize after a long time she met with herself like someone found its lost diamond. Memories are golden, precious like a diamond, but we never care for them. But sometimes they give us strength in our life. Past could be bitter or better, in both ways, it has either happiness or learnings.

Point to be noted here is she didn’t smile, she laughed. The smile could be cosmetic, she used to do that with every client, but laugh cannot be forced, it comes spontaneously. There was no corporate burden on her. She really enjoyed the moment. At that moment she was innocent.

The point here is not that. What if she laughed? But the actual point is her laugh was honest to herself. It was innocent. Try to remember, when it happened last time with you.

When mouth speaks, only ears listen. But when heart speaks than heart listens.

We have a very small life. We come here to play a natural game “Journey by Train”. Whose station will come first, the person will get down. Other have more day in life, so their station could be some days ahead. But at last, the journey will come to an end for all. What is wrong in it, if we able to return a smile on a face? A genuine honest moment to live with.

Cosmetic life never lasts long. In the corporate world, we are living a fake life. Nobody knows what is cooking behind the smile. Hardly, you will get any genuine person, else there is no friend and all competitors.

On one of my trips by the reputed airline, I met with an air hostess having long beautiful hairs. They were shining like sunlight. I started a conversation with her. When I heard the truth of conditions to join as the employment of air hostess, I was shocked to hear that one mandatory condition is, if you don’t have dense or beautiful hair, you need to get bald and wear a wig to look more attractive. She was wearing a wig on her hair. In my view, it is a height of compromise. Now if you see a beautiful air hostess with beautiful hairs, be careful.

But why are we compromising a lot? Why we accept becoming a puppet of others? Well, you will say, just for earnings. A fat salary entry, last day of the month, in my bank account forced me to do so.

Somewhat I should agree with you. In the age of competition, if you are getting a job with a fat salary, with a dissatisfied heart, and this seems OK to you then it seems to also OK for me. I am sure, you will easily push your heart down. You will succeed by making your heart understand, that from where you will get money to fulfill its desires.

I know you have a long list, parent’s illness, younger brother studies, younger sister marriage, your marriage and so … on.

Ok, now allow me to add more addition in the same list. When you become a married couple, the birth of your child, then their upbringings, their educations, your own medical file will be prepared by doctors, a big fat file. And one medical file for your partner along with file for your children. Another one more file, if you have more than one child.

Till then, you are still compromising with your job. Before marriage, favorite part of your life was to go to your social media like your LinkedIn account, and click on “Likes” and write comments, where some big funds are exchanging between companies. And the amount was not small, it was always in billion dollars. Your dreams were high. And now high blood pressure comes in dreams.

My question is simple “When you will start living your own life?” After bed rest, or after death.

To get peace of mind, do not rush behind materials, which can give you peace. Just try to find “Peace of Mind”, then all material will start to give you peace.

In this ambiguous world, even emotions are also fake. Let us talk about a live incident that happened to me.

I was in Dubai for a project with my team. We stayed on a five Start Hotel Grand Millennium somewhere near Shykh Zayed Road. It was the last day of stay and we are preparing for checking out. The whole team reached reception. There were two people at the reception, but only one was free at that time. So he quickly started the process.

After checking out completed, he gave the final invoice print out for all of us. One of my colleagues Mr. Ravi saw his invoice and told the receptionist to sign on the invoice. The receptionist told it does not require. But when Ravi insists, again and again, and it turned into a heated argument. I was trying to understand the situation, in between, I heard a sharp and loud voice of the same person, who was telling “Get Lost, I am the owner of the Hotel” and you insist to sign me on this piece of paper.”

The first time I realized that one of the receptionists who was serving us was the owner of the Hotel. I quickly wanted to finish the quarrel, because our flight was scheduled and we were in a foreign country, where laws are stricter and we could not able to get any immediate help if something happens. I quickly calculated everything and rush toward the reception counter. A heated argument was on, and I interrupted swiftly in between and try to stop the quarrel.

As soon as I understand the situation, I got it that Ravi was wrong, it is a computer generated invoice, which does not require any signature. But that was not the situation, where I could convince him. So soon I requested to the owner of the Hotel that there is a misunderstanding. I told him that we knew that you are the owner of this hotel and that’s why there was a bet between me and Ravi that who will bring your autograph. Actually, he is not asking for a signature, he is requesting for your autograph on this piece of paper.

Suddenly the atmosphere changed. Hotel owner started laughing and he given his signature on the invoice immediately and appreciate us for our stay and requested to come again.

I realized the corporate EGO is nothing, but an on or off switch on an electric board. Hotel owners also want to compromise, but he wanted the point, where his ego is to be satisfied. We surrounded by diplomatic, strategic identities, and positions. But hardly will you get any person who becomes your real friend. Your manager will try to ask you about your family problems, but this is part of his job role. He is actually not interested in your family issues, he is looking for how flexible you are to serve the job better.

When I was in on the job, one day I got an email from “Fun Team”. Every Friday the team used to send something to engage the team with some fun activities. In the email there were two similar type of photographs, and we need to find the differences.

As soon as I went through the email body, I responded with “Reply All”, with a comment “It is easy to find fault from others, but it is very difficult to mend”. My Manager Ranganatha Natarajan saw this email and replied back immediately, “I am being paid for that and this was part of my training to find fault from others”. Fair Enough. He was right. Indirectly he accepted that when he is asking any of your personal issues, he does not mean it, it is the part of his duty.

When I resigned from my last company, I got an invitation from the Director HR, to meet her. We never met before. She wanted to have an informal chat, or you can say an exit interview. Our discussion started with the reason for resignation, but soon our discussion moved to other topics a lot about life, society, social issues, and we shared details of life events.

She was genuine, she understands the meaning of life, pain, happiness, and bliss. But I think during 45 minutes of discussion with me, she forgot her position. She became a human from a robot. She realized the difference between slavery and independence.

She started literally weeping, tears were rolling out from her eyes. I offered her tissue papers from the box lying in front of her central table, and I returned to my seat, without sympathizing with her. Because I wanted her to weep. It was good for her to bring out all the suppressed emotions.

After one month I got the information she is no more with the company, not sure, she resigned or she has been sacked. Corporate World has its own calculations. They want robots, not humans.

At last, I request to readers. Recognize yourself, remove your mask, you have one more identity within yourself, same as an innocent child, who wants to live a life without any condition. Bring it in front.

Be master in your skills. You should be perfectionist, ya agreed it will take time. It comes with experience. But no worry, have patience, you will achieve one day.

People should run behind you to take your services, you should not run behind them.

When you will run behind them, definitely you will compromise. Don’t lose faith in yourself. Keep your foot forward with confidence and strong will power.

Say Big No to compromise. Serve with dignity.

Just remember. You are born to WIN.

So preserve your smile the same innocent as the first time you smile, when you saw this world. Yes, your smile is very precious, It is your lost diamond.

Smile on your achievements not on fat bank balance.

You do not need Corporate Makeup Box to wear Corporate Lipstick.

Thanks for reading.

Bye Bye and Take care of you, yourself, families, friends and near dear one

Always yours,

Neeraj Bhatia ( Direct Email ID : neeraj.bhatia@aaradhyagroups.com)

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“WHY” clears then “HOW” starts

 

In somewhere 2008, I remember there was a famous song from the album “Rock On” hit the Indian music market, and that was having the title “Socha Hai” (Have you think of it?”). Artist was Farhan Akhtar.

The point from the song was very simple. When we saw the world, the very first time, from our own eyes, thousands of questions started coming into our minds. Have you tried to get answers? Yes tried very hard. But whenever we tried to ask the questions, instead of getting an answer, we got rebuked by our elders. Whole childhood was a big question for us?

I start with my questions that arose my mind then. Why I am on this earth? Why does ice melt? Why the sky is blue on the day and black at night? Why there is only one sun? Why the sun is throwing heat, it can’t throw light only? Why the moon is cold? Why the earth is round? From where the air is coming, what is its storage point? Why air is sometimes hot and sometimes cold? Why water changes its colors when merging with some other type of water? Why water does not have its shape? Don’t think, that at that age, I can’t able to even think of these types of questions. Just for your knowledge, my first poem was published, when I was studying in eight classes.

There are a lot of Whys? but all remain unanswered. I still remember, if we try to ask any question, the answer was universal from all members of the family. “Why do you want to waste our time, make yourself busy with your studies”? They could not understand, actually, these answers were the part of our studies.

When we grew up, I realized that the “Why” word was still the same, but the question was different? Why should I go to the temple daily? Why should I study? Why should I take the science stream, commerce stream or Arts stream? Why can’t I become a chef?

In short our “Why?” was always there. From childhood to today? which itching us every day.

First thing first……Why this topic? And How this topic starts?

I was on the 14th floor of my office. This is an open terrace. I saw an eagle, was coming down from its height, with jet speed, within a second she took a mouse in its beak and flew back to its destination. I could hardly saw everything, it started and happened and finishes the task within the blink of my eyes. Why she came down, the reason was to get food. She was hungry. When her “Why” finished her “How” starts. The planning where to prey, whom to prey and when to attack prey. As soon as planning finished, her work finished. There were no high-level meetings called. No WebEx, no late-night calls, no conflicts, no client calls, no scrum meetings, etc. Because she is focused on her limited desires.

Out-of-sight Out of mind: As an employee, if someone thinks that I am the only person, who is working very hard and as a result, the company is growing… wrong…he or she is absolutely wrong. I am having my background in financials. I have a very clear concept of the incorporation of the company. The company is a group of people. It never cares about Individuals. If you are skilled you are an eyeball for your superiors else you are an eyesore for them. Especially, limited companies, there is no individual person is responsible for its profit or loss. Those who don’t know this basic information, always think that this year my promotion is due because I worked very hard in the last financial year. And if the promotion does not happen, then the first question comes in mind is “WHY?” And after a discussion with his superiors, he came out in frustration and the question comes in mind “Why ME only?

Then he or she starts thinking about his or her colleagues, who have less knowledge but got promotion and only then the next BIG question starts HOW? And when he or she got an actual answer, it is shocking to learn that he or she is only a hard-working person, but his or her colleagues are a smart working professional. They have taken all his or her work credits and got a promotion. Here is million-dollar learning “Love your job, not your company because you don’t know when your company stops loving you“.

Another day, another dollar: Americans use this phrase to say that everything is the ordinary, the same routine. Nothing has changed and everything remains the same. Let us see, how developing countries take this phrase, I mean including Indians.

I was reading the speeches of India’s previous assassinated Prime Minister Mrs. Indira Gandhi. In 1974, she delivered one speech where she referred “In India, we could have a family of seven to ten members, but only one member of the family is earning, and the rest of the members of the family depend on him only.

I don’t want to go deep into politics or intentions of politicians, but this was fact and that time, and in some places, it is still true. And there could be so many reasons.

But do you think why this is happening? Because we surrendered our “WHY”? If we have not got any answer to our questions, we start living with ignorance, and this is the point where our “HOW” never comes up.

Especially in India, we learn to live within limits. In one way it is good, but in many ways it is bad. If you will not see the dream, then you will never think of it to be completed. In a simple language, then you will complete only other’s dreams, by doing 12 hours job for them and even then cannot claim for 12 hours salary, because by default it is only for 8 hours job.

One day, King Akbar told his courtyard, Beerbal, “Someone has presented me a comforter, which I want to use, while I sleep, but yesterday night, I tried, but it seems to me short of my body length”. He ordered to call in any tailor and amend it. Birbal tried to call in a lot of tailors, but everybody has given the same excuse, that it is not possible. It is a ready-made comforter and we don’t have the same piece of cloth to amend it.

Birbal tried to convince King Akbar, but he was not ready to accept the reason. Then Birbal realized, this is not possible to resolve the issue with the help of the younger generation. He started to find an experienced person, who can give a fit answer to the King. And at last, he found an old man. The tailor told to Birbal, I will accompany you to King’s palace, but I have a condition that nobody will ask how I satisfied the King.

Birbal had no choice so accepted the condition. The next day, when Beerbal saw that King is giving a lot of prizes to that old man he took a sigh of relief that the issue is resolved. But the main question was HOW he resolved?

Do you have the same question? Ok, let me give you the answer. That experienced tailor understands that “WHY” the king was not ready to accept the universal solution, because of his ego, then he tried to find the answer “HOW” I made him satisfied.

He brought one needle and fix it at the end of the comforter, when the King tried to stretch his legs, the needle pierce his skin and he forced to fold his legs inside the comforter.

The takeaway is “LIMIT YOUR LIMITS”.

Well, the message was clear in different aspects, but our then generations took this message in another way around. Now they have made up their mind that, whatever condition we are in, we need not stretch ourselves, but we need to fold ourselves in between and live life. And the same knowledge they exchanged with the next generation.

Come on. Grow up. The message was taken absolutely in the wrong way. This means if you have seen a pothole, you will not report to the authority. If someone fell down in it, you will say, it is OK, but if that someone is from your family, you will start the blame game on government. But what is our responsibility? How can we shun away from this?

A newly married couple returns to the groom home. A lot of her relatives came to leave her. This was her first entry in the In-Laws house. She was in the veil. Mother-in-Law was very happy. But as soon as she was moving towards the main gate to receive the bride, she saw a black cat was moving around. She thought this cat could go into my kitchen and could destroy all the dishes. Suddenly she found a big basket near her. She took that and put it on the cat, so at least the cat would be caged inside at least for some time. The new bride was looking at everything from the veil. She noted, “it seems this is a custom and I need to follow”.

When the bride’s son grown-up and got married, the same situation happened. She ordered to bring one black cat and one big basket. When her mother-in-law asked why? Then she told, “You did the same when it was my first day in this home”. After clarification, she understood that from the last 30 years, her thinking was wrong.

If she could have guts to ask the question “WHY”, so she could have saved her thirty years, to understand that she was not right. It all started when she surrendered her “WHY’ and tried to copy “HOW”, without understanding the reason behind “WHY”

So the takeaway from this event is very interesting. If you are thinking that you are right, it may be possible that you are wrong. And the possibility is strong enough that you are carrying this wrong information for many years. The resultant next generation’s takeaways are also wrong and so on, and so on.

So if you want to save the next generation from passing your wrong pieces of information to them, you need to start today asking “WHY”, and then only your “HOW will be smooth.

A young and beautiful girl aboard in a train compartment, in which a handsome and beautiful boy was also traveling. she got birth, exactly in front of that boy. She noted he was wearing black sunglasses, which really suits him and he looks more handsome with those. She wanted to talk to him, but due to shyness, she avoided. Suddenly she realized he started staring at her continuously and this makes her very uncomfortable. Initially, she likes her, but now she thought she was wrong, he is a bad guy. She tries to avoid him, but whenever she looked at him, she found he is looking at her only. She wanted to abuse him. Some time back developed feeling for liking him was completely change into hate slogans somewhere inside. She wanted to curse him but somehow managed herself.

After some hours the train stopped and the boy asked about the name of the station. She heard but avoided to give an answer. Somebody nearby told him the name of the station. He tried to find something and stood up. When he opened the foldable white color cane with red bottom circled and started finding obstacles, then only, the first time she realized that he is a blind person. And now the emotions again changed from hate to sympathy.

Again the same question? Why did it happen? because she surrenders her “WHY” and started thinking about “HOW”. How disgraceful this boy is?

At last, I will suggest only one thing, ask, ask and ask “WHY” “WHY” “WHY”? What is the harm in asking? What would be the maximum result? It would be positive or negative. But in both ways, you will get knowledge. At least you will not feel guilty later. Don’t rush towards planning “HOW”, without understanding the purpose of “WHY”.

Do Not underestimate the power of “WHY”? which could save a lot of time of yours.

Thanks for reading.

Bye Bye. Send your review as usual.

Take very good care of yourself and your family, your friends and near and dear ones.

Best Regards,

Neeraj Bhatia

 

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